TGLM: Movie Lightning Round

Recently it has come to my attention that a certain friend/reader of mine (to protect his identity, let's call him...Dylan) thinks that I only review certain types of movies too exclusively for a blog about movies in general. So in order to respond in the most sarcastic and passive aggressive way possible, here is my first ever movie review lightning round, where I'll be reviewing a plethora of random movies of no particular genre or connection.

The Breakfast Club (1985) [R]

Starring: Emilio Estevez, Molly Ringwald, Judd Nelson

If you haven't seen this, you're clearly in your teenage years, as you can't possibly be that old. It follows five high schoolers from different social cliques who end up bonding over their differences and hardships. It is a classic, and for a dang good reason.
Score: «««««

Clueless (1995) [PG-13]

Starring: Alicia Silverstone, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd

There are two things I adore about this movie: The first is that while watching, you find yourself saying "Hey! Its *insert actor name*! I didnt' know he/she was in this!" Second, the product placement in this movie is absolutely disgusting, but in a hilarious way. At one point, lead character Cher is narrating while walking through the cafeteria, looks down and comments about a delicious Snickers bar. For no reason. LOVE IT! Its stupid fun, basically the 90's answer to the Brat Pack movies of the 80's.
Score: «««¶¶

That Thing You Do (1996) [PG]

Starring: Tom Hanks, Liv Tyler, Tom Everett Scott

The movie chronicles a one-hit-wonder band in the 1960's, and follows their meteoric rise to fame, and equally speedy descent. This is one of my favorite Tom Hanks movies, made even more surprising that he writes, directs, and stars in it. A solid comedy/drama with some great music to back it up. I. Am. Spartacus.
Score: ««««¶

O Brother Where Art Thou (2000) [PG-13]

Starring: George Clooney, John Turturro, Tim Blake Nelson

Inspired by Homer's epic poem "The Odyssey", and directed by Joel and Ethan Coen, it follows three chain gang convicts in the 1930's who escape their bondage, and quest towards a mysterious treasure, all while running into unique "Odyssey"-inspired characters. The music is memorable, the acting is phenomenal, and the story is fresh and unique. An absolute must-see.
Score: «««««

The Fall (2006) [R]

Starring: Lee Pace, Catincau Untaru, Justine Waddell

This movie is not only different, but somewhat hard to describe without spoiling things. A broken and depressed 1920's movie stuntman is confined to a hospital bed, where he bonds with a fellow patient in the form of a young girl. The movie flips between two settings: His grim, dreary hospital room, and the gorgeously colorful imaginative world that he spins for the girl within the story he tells her throughout the movie. I was extremely surprised at how much I liked this movie. The colors and settings are beautiful, and the story very much tugs your heartstrings.
Score: ««««¶

Girl, Interrupted (1999) [R]

Starring: Winona Ryder, Angelina Jolie

This movie sucks. Its one of the worst movies I've had the displeasure of laying my eyes on. It tells the story of a young author's time in a mental institution as she befriends another inmate. The acting was atrocious, borderline laughable, and when it came time for the main character's monologue where she flat out said "Maybe I'm just a girl...interrupted" I actually threw my head back and laughed. I get what it's going for, but it failed miserably. If you want a good mental institution movie, watch "One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest". Burn this crap heap of a movie.
Score: «¶¶¶¶

Field of Dreams (1989) [PG]

Starring: Kevin Costner, James Earl Jones, Ray Liotta

If you're young and haven't been exposed to it's glory yet, I'm sure you've still heard "If you build it, they will come". Yeah, that's from this movie. A farmer hears voices that convince him to build a baseball field in his backyard, where ghosts of former baseball players come to practice and play ball. The story is quite different, and the movie as a whole is just fantastic.
Score: ««««¶

Oldboy (2003) [R]

Starring: Min-sik Choi, Ji-tae Yu, Hye-jeong Kang

Quick note: this NOT the American version starring Josh Brolin. This is the Korean movie of the same name/plot that was remade in America. The premise is great, and it has one of the coolest action sequences I've seen in ANY action movie. That said, this movie sucks. It has a strong foreign and cult following, but I thought it was rubbish. The plot moves at a snail's pace, and makes zero sense, and the ending is just...ugh. If you're interested for the sake of hearsay, go for it. But whereas sex and violence in movies don't usually bother me, things get uncomfortable in this movie. Yeesh.
Score: ««¶¶¶

Charlie Bartlett (2007) [R]

Starring: Anton Yelchin, Robert Downey Jr., Kat Dennings

An over privileged teen who has dreams of fame becomes a psychiatrist to fellow students, and comes at odds with the principal over the means of his practice. It'll make you laugh, sigh, and say "aww". Chances are no matter who you are, there's a character for you to relate to. While I don't like Kat Dennings, you should still check this out.
Score: «««¶¶

Everything Is Illuminated (2005) [PG-13]

Starring: Elijah Wood, Eugene Hutz, Boris Leskin, Mikki the dog

Based on the book of the same name, Jonathan, a young Jewish man, takes a trip to Ukraine in order to locate the woman who saved his grandfather's life during World War II. The movie is very quiet, and powerful. The cast of characters is small, but their interactions are wonderful. This is one of my favorite performances by Elijah Wood.
Score: «««¶¶

Something Borrowed (2011) [PG-13]

Starring: Ginnifer Goodwin, Kate Hudson, John Krasinski

It's your typical romantic comedy. Girl is with guy, viewer wants girl to end up with different guy before the impending wedding. Hilarity ensues. I do enjoy the occasional rom-com though, and this movie had some decent acting, fun humor, and plenty of clever moments. It is based on a book, and the after-credits scene sets up for a very entertaining sequel that never came. Check this out if you need a pick-me-up.
Score: ««¶¶¶

The Other Boleyn Girl (2008) [PG-13]

Starring: Natalie Portman, Scarlett Johansson, Eric Bana

Yes, I have actually seen this movie start to finish, and it SUCKS. I do like history movies, but this is awful. I've never liked Portman in anything she's been in (a lot of people like her in V For Vendetta, but I didn't even like her in that). Scarlett Johansson is forgettable, and Eric Bana is just typical Eric Bana. Not awful, but definitely not Oscar-worthy. For a 2 hour movie, it honestly felt like 4 hours to me.
Score: ««¶¶¶


Random reader we've passively named Dylan, I hope this sates your sass for a while. Stay beautiful.