Another holiday season has come and gone, and with it, all the best movies of the year. I have to admit, 2013 was pretty lackluster for movies if I do say so myself, but that said I am REALLY looking forward to 2014! From the upcoming summer hits like Amazing Spider-Man 2, to next holiday's sure-to-be smashes like the final Hobbit film, it's sure to be a good one!
That said, I'm guessing that those two that I mentioned are probably the highlights that most people know about. So today I'm going to be covering part one of my 2014 movie preview! So let's get started with January - March. And because I love you all sooo much, I've linked trailers to each movie if you click the titles! Enjoy!
I bet January will be great! I can't wait for January's awesome movies!
JANUARY:
1/2
-Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
Oh...another found-footage horror movie? This is also the 6th Paranormal Activity movie? Huh. Well, they can't all be winners, but I'm sure the rest of the month will be good!
1/9
-The Legend of Hercules
Huh. The first of two Hercules movies coming out in 2014, which is blatantly ripping off every scene from "300"...mmmkay so again maybe not a super original way to start the year, but let's move on.
1/17
-Devil's Due
A...another crappy Paranormal Activity-type horror movie? Two in the first month...um, okay, this isn't going well but I'm SURE there's one good one in January!
-Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
Super-spy being chased by his own government, and doesn't know why...so, its just a Bourne movie? Wow, this is a bad start. But hey, we've got one more super hyped movie, I bet its totally original! I still have faith!
1/24
-I, Frankenstein
*sigh* From the producers of Underworld comes...Underworld, but this time starring the guy who played Two-Face in "The Dark Knight".
So all-in-all, every hyped movie in January is utter crap, and is in some way totally copying or ripping off something else in a huge way, with absolutely ZERO originality. Crap. Well, let's leave this garbage month behind, and see what February has...surely something note-worthy?!
FEBRUARY:
2/7
-The LEGO Movie
Awww yeah! Here we go! A HUGE cast of voice actors in a movie about one of the most popular toys of all time! This movie looks great, and the trailers seem to market it as one of those kids movies that will have plenty of jokes for the adults too. The movie will be featuring LEGO versions of hundreds of characters, including Batman, Superman, Ninja Turtles, several pro athletes, Abraham Lincoln, and many many more.
-The Monuments Men
Starring George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, and more, this movie is not your typical World War 2 shoot-em-up. It tells the true story of a group of art historians who were sent into Italy in WW2 to obtain as many timeless pieces of art as they could from out of the Nazi's hands. Definitely going to see this one!
2/12
-RoboCop
A reboot, with a very iffy mix of reactions so far, RoboCop brings a big-name cast (including Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson, and Gary Oldman) to re-tell the origin of the futuristic cyborg law-bringer. I'll reserve judgement, as it looks good, but I know how hard it's been in the past for companies to reboot 80's action flicks.
-Vampire Academy
Ugh. The preview basically tells me that its Twilight, but trying to be sexier. In other words, a bunch of 17 year olds sucking each other's necks. Pass. But I figured I'd mention it since I'm sure you'll all be seeing countless commercials for it in the coming weeks.
2/21
-Pompeii
Another movie ripping off every famous scene from "300" from the looks of it. As the title implies, it tells the story of the destruction of Pompeii, but with all the slow-motion and streams of blood ripped off from every other movie made in this time period from the past 6 or 7 years. I may watch it if it ever goes on Netflix, but if I want to see the same shots over and over, I'll just watch "300" again. Y'know, a quick side-note here: "Troy" managed to pull off that time period just as well as "300" and without all the unnecessary Zack Snyder trademarks of slow-motion blood and sex scenes...I'm really excited for when movies STOP ripping off the Snyder style.
-The Wind Rises
Ok, after the few weeks of boredom there after you all went to see the "LEGO Movie", now we can all return to theaters to see Miyazaki's final masterpiece. If you've seen any of his past movies (My Neighbor Totoro, Ponyo, Howl's Moving Castle, etc.) you'll know what to expect, because Miyazaki never disappoints!
2/28
-Son of God
Uh oh...a Biblical movie. Don't get me wrong, as a Lutheran I have absolutely nothing wrong with spreading the word through the big-screen, and I remember how big of an impact "Passion of the Christ" made. But that said, this movie looks like it may be foregoing the actual Bible in some areas, just to draw in a bigger crowd. I'm hopeful, but very wary on this one...
MARCH:
3/7
-300: Rise Of An Empire
Ooooh JOY. We're only in March, and we already have three movies based in the time period of ancient Greece, and with the exact same visual style. From the same director as the original "300" comes an extremely unnecessary, money-grubbing sequel. Just re-watch the original "300".
-The Grand Budapest Hotel
Here we go, something good! This is the newest film from director Wes Anderson, one of my favorites. If you've seen his past movies (The Royal Tennenbaums, Rushmore, The Life Aquatic) you know who will star in it, and what it'll be like. Although this one does add some actors relatively new to Wes Anderson, such as Ralph Fiennes, and Edward Norton!
-Journey To The West
From the makers of "Kung Fu Hustle" comes pretty much Kung Fu Hustle 2. I love Stephen Chow's movies, they're always a really absurd mix of kung fu, and slapstick comedy that I can only describe as what an anime would look like if it were filmed in live-action. Go watch "Kung Fu Hustle" and if you like it, you'll probably like this!
-Mr. Peabody & Sherman
An unnecessary 3D adaptation of a really old cartoon. Pass.
3/14
-Need for Speed
Starring the guy who played Jesse on "Breaking Bad" comes the closest thing you'll get to "Fast & Furious 7" this year. Fast cars, explosions, most likely women in short skirts. Enough said.
-Tyler Perry's Single Mom's Club
WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP SEEING THESE?! Tyler Perry...STAAAAHP!!!
3/21
-Muppets Most Wanted
Following the surprising success of the most recent Muppets movie, comes another star-studded family adventure! I'm looking forward to watching Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, and more interact with Kermit and his pals. I'll be seeing this one early on!
3/28
-Noah
Aaand here's our second Biblical adaptation of the year. I'm VERY wary of this one. It looks cool because of the big-name cast and very nice special effects, but from what I've read of the synopsis, they stray waaaaaay away from the actual Bible story of the flood. We'll have to see about this one...
PHEW! There you are, the biggest upcoming movies from January through March. Keep a lookout soon for part two, and sound off in the comments if I missed any that you've been looking forward to!
Monday, January 6, 2014
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Frozen
Its pretty rare that I actually get the chance to see a movie in theaters these days, so now that I finally did, here's what I thought of Disney's latest.
Frozen (PG)
Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk
Whats it about: Princess Anna embarks on a journey to help her sister Elsa, the rightful heir to their kingdom's throne, who possesses the magical power to produce snow/ice.
Going into this movie, I had no idea what the plot was, which was honestly rather refreshing! Its really difficult to describe the plot without giving anything away, because its a lot of fun to just discover it for yourself. Disney definitely knows what they're doing!
That said, there is a LOT of great stuff in this movie, but there was some stuff that bugged me too. But hey, lets start with the good:
This. Movie. Is. BEAUTIFUL. The animation of the characters is great, the snow is very well done, but what absolutely blew me away was the frost powers that Elsa wields. Wow! I didn't see this movie in 3D, but this is one of the only movies I've ever actually wished I did.
At one point in the movie, Elsa creates something very cool out of ice, and visually it gave me chills. Pixar never disappoints when it comes to looks, that's for sure.
Its no secret that Tangled is my absolute favorite Disney movie, in a large way due to the characters, and how they are a great mix of the classic prince/princess formula, and modern society. That is definitely visible in this movie as well. It seems that Disney princesses are taking a turn to become "like totally" teen girls, which is just as fun in Frozen as it was in Tangled. I wasn't disappointed by a single character. In typical Disney fashion, there's two hilarious non-human characters, Sven the reindeer, and Olaf the snowman. Honestly, when I saw the trailers I thought Olaf was going to be a completely idiotic character, I thought all his little quips were just terrible. But in the full movie, he had some of the best lines! He's pretty obviously just there for the kids, as he constantly points out major plot points in somewhat of an "In case you missed it" style. Its annoying, but hey, he serves his purpose.
Again, not going to spoil anything, but I loved the ending too! Throughout the final climax, I was sighing internally because I figured I knew exactly what was going to happen. Well I was wrong, and pleasantly surprised! They really push the sisterhood thing way more than the "true love" which is a refreshing change!
Okay I've covered all my favorite parts, but there were some things that still bugged me, and prevented me from truly loving this movie. For starters, the songs. Now don't get me wrong, I know Disney movies are no stranger to music, and actually I thought the songs were fantastic in Tangled! What I did feel about this movie, however, is that there were too many songs, and some of them felt really unnecessary. Half of them were just dialogue conversations that had music, and it just felt like they didn't need to be sung. I really liked some of the songs, especially the opening number, but overall I feel like if they toned it down by maybe 3 or 4 songs, it would have been a little better.
I also wasn't a big fan of Elsa's singing voice, but that's just personal preference, so ignore that if you want to.
Verdict: 7.5 out of 10. Definitely go see it! I like that it wasn't over-hyped like most Disney movies, and was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked the characters.
Remember to keep an eye out for some Disney cameos!
*P.S.: There is an extra scene after the credits*
BONUS ROUND: The short before the movie
I always love the short movies they play before each Disney/Pixar film. But sadly I gotta give this one a low grade. It's a fun homage to classic "steamboat willie"-era Disney cartoons, but compared to some of their other more recent shorts, like "Paperman" (shown before "Wreck-It Ralph"), or even "La Luna" (shown before "Brave") were much more enjoyable. They do have a small Marvel cameo that made me laugh pretty hard though, so keep an eye out!
6 out of 10 for the short. Good, not great.
Frozen (PG)
Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk
Whats it about: Princess Anna embarks on a journey to help her sister Elsa, the rightful heir to their kingdom's throne, who possesses the magical power to produce snow/ice.
Going into this movie, I had no idea what the plot was, which was honestly rather refreshing! Its really difficult to describe the plot without giving anything away, because its a lot of fun to just discover it for yourself. Disney definitely knows what they're doing!
That said, there is a LOT of great stuff in this movie, but there was some stuff that bugged me too. But hey, lets start with the good:
This. Movie. Is. BEAUTIFUL. The animation of the characters is great, the snow is very well done, but what absolutely blew me away was the frost powers that Elsa wields. Wow! I didn't see this movie in 3D, but this is one of the only movies I've ever actually wished I did.At one point in the movie, Elsa creates something very cool out of ice, and visually it gave me chills. Pixar never disappoints when it comes to looks, that's for sure.
Its no secret that Tangled is my absolute favorite Disney movie, in a large way due to the characters, and how they are a great mix of the classic prince/princess formula, and modern society. That is definitely visible in this movie as well. It seems that Disney princesses are taking a turn to become "like totally" teen girls, which is just as fun in Frozen as it was in Tangled. I wasn't disappointed by a single character. In typical Disney fashion, there's two hilarious non-human characters, Sven the reindeer, and Olaf the snowman. Honestly, when I saw the trailers I thought Olaf was going to be a completely idiotic character, I thought all his little quips were just terrible. But in the full movie, he had some of the best lines! He's pretty obviously just there for the kids, as he constantly points out major plot points in somewhat of an "In case you missed it" style. Its annoying, but hey, he serves his purpose.
Again, not going to spoil anything, but I loved the ending too! Throughout the final climax, I was sighing internally because I figured I knew exactly what was going to happen. Well I was wrong, and pleasantly surprised! They really push the sisterhood thing way more than the "true love" which is a refreshing change!
Okay I've covered all my favorite parts, but there were some things that still bugged me, and prevented me from truly loving this movie. For starters, the songs. Now don't get me wrong, I know Disney movies are no stranger to music, and actually I thought the songs were fantastic in Tangled! What I did feel about this movie, however, is that there were too many songs, and some of them felt really unnecessary. Half of them were just dialogue conversations that had music, and it just felt like they didn't need to be sung. I really liked some of the songs, especially the opening number, but overall I feel like if they toned it down by maybe 3 or 4 songs, it would have been a little better.I also wasn't a big fan of Elsa's singing voice, but that's just personal preference, so ignore that if you want to.
Verdict: 7.5 out of 10. Definitely go see it! I like that it wasn't over-hyped like most Disney movies, and was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked the characters.
Remember to keep an eye out for some Disney cameos!
*P.S.: There is an extra scene after the credits*
BONUS ROUND: The short before the movie
I always love the short movies they play before each Disney/Pixar film. But sadly I gotta give this one a low grade. It's a fun homage to classic "steamboat willie"-era Disney cartoons, but compared to some of their other more recent shorts, like "Paperman" (shown before "Wreck-It Ralph"), or even "La Luna" (shown before "Brave") were much more enjoyable. They do have a small Marvel cameo that made me laugh pretty hard though, so keep an eye out!
6 out of 10 for the short. Good, not great.
Monday, December 9, 2013
Something Old, Something New: 5 must-see past, and future setting movies
Hark! A moving picture!
'Tis truly rare that a lad such as I might become engrossed in such thrilling tales of olden days. Aye that this may be true, but whence I become enthralled, indeed yon films tend to linger in mine head! Travel with me now, to days of old, as we review my top 5 movies set in the distant past:
Red Cliff (2008)
When it was released, Red Cliff quickly became the highest grossing movie in China of all time. Produced by legendary action star John Woo, it tells the story of the Three Kingdoms era of Chinese history (one of my favorite time periods to study, so again kinda biased but who cares). This is a long movie, and even had to be cut down for the American version by several hours, and expanded into two parts, so I'll try to give a brief description of the plot:
After the fall of the Han dynasty, one of China's most prosperous times, the land was divided and left without central leadership. This led into the Three Kingdoms period, in which China was brutally battled over between three warlords, and several other smaller armies vying for power. Red Cliff takes place during one of the pivotal battles of this era, the battle of Red Cliff. There are a lot of characters to follow, but thats the gist.
Okay okay, so I kinda geeked out there, but for Pete's sake, I love this time period so much I almost studied Chinese history in college just so I could learn more! There have been a lot of movies set during the Three Kingdoms era within the past few years, (Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon, Red Cliff pt. 1 and 2, The Lost Bladesman, The Assassins, Little Big Soldier) but Red Cliff is by far the best. Just...go watch it. It's on Netflix, okay? GO!
Master & Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)
Russell Crowe and Paul Bettany take the lead in what I would easily consider my favorite historic movie. Set during the Napoleonic wars, the film follows Captain Jack Aubrey (Crowe), a British naval captain as he pursues a French ship containing sensitive information that could cost many lives if not stopped. Aside from the fantastic naval combat, every actor in the movie plays their part extraordinarily convincingly, leading to some wonderful, and some heart-breaking moments, surprisingly none of which involve any romance. Paul Bettany co-stars as Aubrey's long-time friend and the ships surgeon, Dr. Matruin. The back-and-forth between Crowe and Bettany progresses the story very well, even when cannonballs aren't flying.
The movie is fairly long, but I'd definitely call it a must-see, whether you're looking for drama, action, or story.
Gangs of New York (2002)
Set during the Civil War, the story revolves around the Five Points district of New York, during an ongoing dispute between U.S.-born Americans, and the rising swell of immigrants, being primarily Irish. Leonardo DiCaprio gives, what I feel is one of his strongest performances as Amsterdam Vallon, the son of the Irish immigrant's leader. After his father is killed by their rival gang's leader, Bill Cutting, a.k.a. The Butcher (played amazingly by Daniel Day Lewis) when he is a child, he seeks revenge by siding with The Butcher when he grows up. Cameron Diaz also stars, but honestly in my opinion she does a forgettable job.
Another fairly long, and dialogue heavy movie, but the constant stream of tense moments between Amsterdam and Bill lead up to a satisfying climax.
The Last Samurai (2003)
Tom Cruise movies are pretty iffy to me, but when he has a good movie, its fantastic! This is one of those times. The movie takes place during the initial Westernization of Japan, and follows U.S. military commander Nathan Algren as he is sent to instruct the Japanese armies on western military tactics. As the title hints, the time period also takes place during the end of the samurai era. Algren is captured during an initial battle with the samurai, and eventually comes to embrace their ways after meeting Katsumoto (played by Ken Watanabe, a phenomenal eastern actor), a high-ranking Samurai warrior.
The plot may be a little "Dances With Wolves/Pocahontas/Avatar/etc...", but its still a great ride. I'm kind of a sucker for Asian cinema, and this strikes a perfect balance between East/West, making it easy to follow whether or not you know anything about the time period.
Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
Musical, yes. Gory, yes. But great story and acting, most definitely! Rounding out my period-movies is Sweeny Todd. If you know Tim Burton, you know what this movie will look like, and who it'll star. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, it follows the story of Sweeny Todd, a man recently released from wrongful imprisonment in Industrial-age London. He seeks revenge on the man who wrongfully convicted him, and kills lots of people on the way, but that's not why he does it. He's just jaded and misunderstood. Great acting, good music, way on the gory side, so if you're squeamish, beware. All-in-all though, worth at least one watch!
Pretty soon, they'll beam it into your brain...
Now that we've successfully re-lived the past through some fantastic cinematic experiences, let's take a look at what the future holds! Whether travelling to far-off galaxies and meeting three-boobed alien prostitutes, or even here on the nuclear wasteland that is earth, the future holds some interesting potential. Let's take a look!
Equilibrium (2002)
Starring Christian Bale (before he was just the Batman guy) and Sean Bean (before he was the Game of Thrones guy), Equilibrium takes place in a dystopian future where all traces of emotion have been eliminated from life, leading to perfection and order. But, as there always is, there is resistance in the form of an underground movement who decides not to take their emotion-regulating pills. What follows is a predictable action movie, but with some spectacular visuals, and some of the coolest gun-play scenes I've seen in any movie. The main characters practice a form of gun-fu, basically just total ass-kickery, while wielding two pistols. Solid acting all around, definitely a fun movie. Its on Netflix, so no excuses!
The Fifth Element (1997)
Directed by Luc Besson (director of Leon: The Professional, and the upcoming film Lucy), and starring Bruce Willis (Die Hard) and Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil), this is one of my all-time favorites. Every 5,000 years, an ancient evil awakens to destroy humanity. And in futuristic New York, its up to former soldier, and current cab driver Korben Dallas (Willis) to save the day.
This movie is a pop culture gem, and nowadays has a huge pop culture following. Check it out (again, on Netflix) of you like comedy, action, romance, y'know what...just watch it. You'll like it, I promise.
Idiocracy (2006)
This is not your typical futuristic movie, but by far I find its the most accurate portrayal that I can imagine of the future. When an oafish army-man (Luke Wilson) is used in an experiment to freeze soldiers to be un-thawed in the future, he is accidentally frozen for hundreds of years. While he's frozen, the planet takes its natural course, and becomes filled with inbred, uneducated, beer chugging, Jackass-watching morons. The formerly not-so-bright soldier wakes up as the smartest person on the planet, which isn't saying much!
This movie has no small chunk of political commentary in it's quirky, dumb humor, but either way its very fun to watch the potential future where all water is replaced by energy drinks, the president is a former professional wrestler, and the popular restaurant Fuddrucker's has changed its name to....well, I'll let you find out. Its not hard.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
This may not be the typical flying cars, aliens and space-travel movie, but this near-future dark comedy is definitely worth checking out. Society is largely the same, except that everyone can get a procedure done that allows you to wipe your memory clean of certain events, or in this case, people. Jim Carrey (The Mask, Dumb & Dumber) stars, and goes through the process of having his ex-girlfriend wiped from his mind.
Visually, this is a movie you're going to want to pay attention for. There's a lot happening, but the way it all fits together is very interesting and unique. Very engrossing characters and a solid story equal a somewhat overlooked gem. Once again, its on Netflix.
Starship Troopers (1997)
Finally we have another cult classic space action movie. Known for the ironic and terrible acting, and based on a book that the movie plot has damn near nothing to do with, it follows Rico (Casper Van Dien) and his friends as they join the army to fight off a race of gigantic bug aliens. Its hard to describe this movie in a serious light, so I'm honestly going to just suggest you check it out (EHEM....ON NETFLIX, they should really be paying me for mentioning them so much).
NOTE: At least 7 of the 10 movies I discussed are on Netflix instant stream, so check them out. You don't even have to get up to buy/rent them!
'Tis truly rare that a lad such as I might become engrossed in such thrilling tales of olden days. Aye that this may be true, but whence I become enthralled, indeed yon films tend to linger in mine head! Travel with me now, to days of old, as we review my top 5 movies set in the distant past:
Red Cliff (2008)When it was released, Red Cliff quickly became the highest grossing movie in China of all time. Produced by legendary action star John Woo, it tells the story of the Three Kingdoms era of Chinese history (one of my favorite time periods to study, so again kinda biased but who cares). This is a long movie, and even had to be cut down for the American version by several hours, and expanded into two parts, so I'll try to give a brief description of the plot:
After the fall of the Han dynasty, one of China's most prosperous times, the land was divided and left without central leadership. This led into the Three Kingdoms period, in which China was brutally battled over between three warlords, and several other smaller armies vying for power. Red Cliff takes place during one of the pivotal battles of this era, the battle of Red Cliff. There are a lot of characters to follow, but thats the gist.
Okay okay, so I kinda geeked out there, but for Pete's sake, I love this time period so much I almost studied Chinese history in college just so I could learn more! There have been a lot of movies set during the Three Kingdoms era within the past few years, (Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon, Red Cliff pt. 1 and 2, The Lost Bladesman, The Assassins, Little Big Soldier) but Red Cliff is by far the best. Just...go watch it. It's on Netflix, okay? GO!
Master & Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)Russell Crowe and Paul Bettany take the lead in what I would easily consider my favorite historic movie. Set during the Napoleonic wars, the film follows Captain Jack Aubrey (Crowe), a British naval captain as he pursues a French ship containing sensitive information that could cost many lives if not stopped. Aside from the fantastic naval combat, every actor in the movie plays their part extraordinarily convincingly, leading to some wonderful, and some heart-breaking moments, surprisingly none of which involve any romance. Paul Bettany co-stars as Aubrey's long-time friend and the ships surgeon, Dr. Matruin. The back-and-forth between Crowe and Bettany progresses the story very well, even when cannonballs aren't flying.
The movie is fairly long, but I'd definitely call it a must-see, whether you're looking for drama, action, or story.
Gangs of New York (2002)Set during the Civil War, the story revolves around the Five Points district of New York, during an ongoing dispute between U.S.-born Americans, and the rising swell of immigrants, being primarily Irish. Leonardo DiCaprio gives, what I feel is one of his strongest performances as Amsterdam Vallon, the son of the Irish immigrant's leader. After his father is killed by their rival gang's leader, Bill Cutting, a.k.a. The Butcher (played amazingly by Daniel Day Lewis) when he is a child, he seeks revenge by siding with The Butcher when he grows up. Cameron Diaz also stars, but honestly in my opinion she does a forgettable job.
Another fairly long, and dialogue heavy movie, but the constant stream of tense moments between Amsterdam and Bill lead up to a satisfying climax.
The Last Samurai (2003)Tom Cruise movies are pretty iffy to me, but when he has a good movie, its fantastic! This is one of those times. The movie takes place during the initial Westernization of Japan, and follows U.S. military commander Nathan Algren as he is sent to instruct the Japanese armies on western military tactics. As the title hints, the time period also takes place during the end of the samurai era. Algren is captured during an initial battle with the samurai, and eventually comes to embrace their ways after meeting Katsumoto (played by Ken Watanabe, a phenomenal eastern actor), a high-ranking Samurai warrior.
The plot may be a little "Dances With Wolves/Pocahontas/Avatar/etc...", but its still a great ride. I'm kind of a sucker for Asian cinema, and this strikes a perfect balance between East/West, making it easy to follow whether or not you know anything about the time period.
Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)Musical, yes. Gory, yes. But great story and acting, most definitely! Rounding out my period-movies is Sweeny Todd. If you know Tim Burton, you know what this movie will look like, and who it'll star. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, it follows the story of Sweeny Todd, a man recently released from wrongful imprisonment in Industrial-age London. He seeks revenge on the man who wrongfully convicted him, and kills lots of people on the way, but that's not why he does it. He's just jaded and misunderstood. Great acting, good music, way on the gory side, so if you're squeamish, beware. All-in-all though, worth at least one watch!
Pretty soon, they'll beam it into your brain...
Now that we've successfully re-lived the past through some fantastic cinematic experiences, let's take a look at what the future holds! Whether travelling to far-off galaxies and meeting three-boobed alien prostitutes, or even here on the nuclear wasteland that is earth, the future holds some interesting potential. Let's take a look!
Equilibrium (2002)Starring Christian Bale (before he was just the Batman guy) and Sean Bean (before he was the Game of Thrones guy), Equilibrium takes place in a dystopian future where all traces of emotion have been eliminated from life, leading to perfection and order. But, as there always is, there is resistance in the form of an underground movement who decides not to take their emotion-regulating pills. What follows is a predictable action movie, but with some spectacular visuals, and some of the coolest gun-play scenes I've seen in any movie. The main characters practice a form of gun-fu, basically just total ass-kickery, while wielding two pistols. Solid acting all around, definitely a fun movie. Its on Netflix, so no excuses!
The Fifth Element (1997)Directed by Luc Besson (director of Leon: The Professional, and the upcoming film Lucy), and starring Bruce Willis (Die Hard) and Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil), this is one of my all-time favorites. Every 5,000 years, an ancient evil awakens to destroy humanity. And in futuristic New York, its up to former soldier, and current cab driver Korben Dallas (Willis) to save the day.
This movie is a pop culture gem, and nowadays has a huge pop culture following. Check it out (again, on Netflix) of you like comedy, action, romance, y'know what...just watch it. You'll like it, I promise.
Idiocracy (2006)This is not your typical futuristic movie, but by far I find its the most accurate portrayal that I can imagine of the future. When an oafish army-man (Luke Wilson) is used in an experiment to freeze soldiers to be un-thawed in the future, he is accidentally frozen for hundreds of years. While he's frozen, the planet takes its natural course, and becomes filled with inbred, uneducated, beer chugging, Jackass-watching morons. The formerly not-so-bright soldier wakes up as the smartest person on the planet, which isn't saying much!
This movie has no small chunk of political commentary in it's quirky, dumb humor, but either way its very fun to watch the potential future where all water is replaced by energy drinks, the president is a former professional wrestler, and the popular restaurant Fuddrucker's has changed its name to....well, I'll let you find out. Its not hard.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)This may not be the typical flying cars, aliens and space-travel movie, but this near-future dark comedy is definitely worth checking out. Society is largely the same, except that everyone can get a procedure done that allows you to wipe your memory clean of certain events, or in this case, people. Jim Carrey (The Mask, Dumb & Dumber) stars, and goes through the process of having his ex-girlfriend wiped from his mind.
Visually, this is a movie you're going to want to pay attention for. There's a lot happening, but the way it all fits together is very interesting and unique. Very engrossing characters and a solid story equal a somewhat overlooked gem. Once again, its on Netflix.
Starship Troopers (1997)Finally we have another cult classic space action movie. Known for the ironic and terrible acting, and based on a book that the movie plot has damn near nothing to do with, it follows Rico (Casper Van Dien) and his friends as they join the army to fight off a race of gigantic bug aliens. Its hard to describe this movie in a serious light, so I'm honestly going to just suggest you check it out (EHEM....ON NETFLIX, they should really be paying me for mentioning them so much).
NOTE: At least 7 of the 10 movies I discussed are on Netflix instant stream, so check them out. You don't even have to get up to buy/rent them!
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Upside Down
Y'know, its been a while since I straight-up reviewed a movie, so here you go!
Upside Down (2012)
PG-13
Starring: Jim Sturgess (Accross The Universe, 21), Kirsten Dunst (Spider-Man, Drop Dead Gorgeous), Timothy Spall (Harry Potter series)
What its all about: In one sentence, picture the special effects of "Inception" meets the basic forbidden love plot of "Romeo & Juliet" and you have "Upside Down". Adam and Eden live on two separate planets that share a gravitational pole, except that they're reversed. Eden's planet represents the "upper class" where life is just better, and Adam's planet is basically the slums. Its extremely frowned upon for people from the two planets to interact.
 |
| Seriously...dizzying but awesome. |
The main two actors are pretty good, Jim Sturgess being far better of the two, but I thought Timothy Spall stole the show. Without spoiling anything, he plays a co-worker of Adam, but from the opposite world. Their interactions are actually really fun to watch and listen to, and the visual layout of their scenes is really cool since they're on opposite worlds.
 |
| Gravity. It's a bitch. |
I do however have to call out a few very poorly done parts of the movie, starting with the narration in the beginning/end of the movie. I think Jim Sturgess is a very talented young actor who wasn't utilized enough after his initial breakthrough success in "Across The Universe", but that said, his narrating is weak, at best. It sounds like he's trying to seductively whisper into your ear and tell you the story of someone else he loves. *shudder*
On top of that, the story itself follows way too much of a cookie-cutter pattern. I feel like they spent so much time on the visual effects that they forgot there had to be a story too! My final beef with the movie is that while the visuals are unlike almost any movie I've seen in recent memory, they suffer the same fate as equally visually striking movies (e.g. "Cloverfield" or "Inception"): you will almost assuredly get dizzy or a headache watching this movie. The gravity-play is absolutely great, but it is a bit headache-inducing.
PLEASE don't let that deter you, though! I highly suggest everyone give this movie a chance! If not just for the visuals.
 |
| No seriously, the visuals are fantastic. |
Verdict: 7 out of 10
I really wish I could rate this movie higher, and say that its one of my new favorites, but the story was just too weak to merit any higher. A pretty even mix of good and terrible acting tend to balance out, and honestly for this movie being as short as it is (roughly 100 mins) I feel like it could have been longer, had a little more story to it, and it would have been a blockbuster. Instead it seems to be one that is somewhat lesser known. I don't even remember it coming to theaters...
I HIGHLY recommend you watch it, IT'S ON NETFLIX! But I can't say its one that I would go out and buy.
Monday, November 11, 2013
When the Credits Roll: The Consequences of the Hero's Actions
This weekend, I watched the Christmas classic "Jingle All The Way" starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and comedian Sinbad (for the third time since October...) and I realized, something has been bothering me, but until now I never knew what it was.
It wasn't until the ending scene of "The Avengers" that I heard a movie point out that the heroe(s) was never held accountable for their actions. This got me thinking: are the good guys in movies really as good as they seem? When do they reap the consequences of their actions?
So today I'd like to dive into this very subject, starting with the above mentioned classic, "Jingle All The Way". (For those of you who may not have seen it since it's 1996 release, SPOILER ALERT!! Also, shame on you.)
****Let me point out this is purely for fun, I'm not taking this too seriously. Again, this is just for laughs. It is just a movie after all****
I'm going to start by listing off the rap-sheet that I noticed in chronological order, so feel free to correct me in the comments if I missed any of the hero's "heroic feats".
Howard Langston (Arnold Schwarzenegger), our beloved hero:
-Speeding / Driving on the shoulder of the freeway
-Destruction of police property
-Assaulting a minor
-Knowingly purchasing counterfeit goods
-Impersonating an officer
-Breaking and entering
-Theft
-Assaulting an officer
-Resisting arrest
-Destruction of public property
Outside of these, he's just not a great person in general. The following aren't necessarily broken laws, but still not really admirable traits: The guy puts work before his family constantly, he rigged a city-wide contest so that his son would win, after HE screwed up and forgot to buy his kid a Christmas present! Then in a deleted after-credits scene, we find out he didn't get his wife anything either!!
I probably even missed a few, but you get the idea. Now I'm no policeman, but I have to think that with all of these crimes added together, this guy's gotta be looking at 10-15 years, MINIMUM! And what happens in the end? Because he's dressed in the costume of an American icon, he's carried away on the shoulders of the everyday citizen. I ask you, is this really how we want to treat such incredible offenses?
And we haven't even mentioned Myron (Sinbad) the frickin' TERRORIST!! Am I the only one who thinks its a bit out of the ordinary that the guy threatens to blow up a radio station with a BOMB!? Oh, and then later actually BLOWS UP a police officer?! Yeah something tells me in post-9/11 times, that's gonna get you more than just a slap on the wrist before you strut home to your son with that action figure, pal.
And don't forget the attempted kidnapping of a child, and actual kidnapping of the actor who was supposed to play Dementor in the Christmas Eve parade! This guy is an openly admitted psychopath! He flat-out tells a group of police officers that he is mentally unstable! Sure he may be able to use that in court, but even if he gets off with an insanity plea, there is no way his son is staying in that household. Way to bust your ass for that toy, Myron, but you'll be going away for a long time.
I'm sure you could do this for every movie under the sun, but this is just one example of how unsettling the consequences of the hero's actions can really be. Don't get me wrong, I'll never stop watching this movie, but its always fun to go all detective on this kind of stuff. But if you ask me, the REAL hero of this movie is the mother. Not only does she not commit one single misdeed against the law or her family, but she consistently defends her husband and puts her butt on the line while she KNOWS that he is consistently screwing up! That woman wins the award of movie hero in my book.
Have you ever noticed the hero being rewarded for severe law-breaking in your favorite movie(s)? Sound off in the comments below!
It wasn't until the ending scene of "The Avengers" that I heard a movie point out that the heroe(s) was never held accountable for their actions. This got me thinking: are the good guys in movies really as good as they seem? When do they reap the consequences of their actions?
 |
| Finally! A hero faces justice!!! MWAHAHA!!! er....sorry |
So today I'd like to dive into this very subject, starting with the above mentioned classic, "Jingle All The Way". (For those of you who may not have seen it since it's 1996 release, SPOILER ALERT!! Also, shame on you.)
****Let me point out this is purely for fun, I'm not taking this too seriously. Again, this is just for laughs. It is just a movie after all****
I'm going to start by listing off the rap-sheet that I noticed in chronological order, so feel free to correct me in the comments if I missed any of the hero's "heroic feats".
Howard Langston (Arnold Schwarzenegger), our beloved hero:
-Speeding / Driving on the shoulder of the freeway
-Destruction of police property
-Assaulting a minor
-Knowingly purchasing counterfeit goods
-Impersonating an officer
-Breaking and entering
-Theft
-Assaulting an officer
-Resisting arrest
-Destruction of public property
Outside of these, he's just not a great person in general. The following aren't necessarily broken laws, but still not really admirable traits: The guy puts work before his family constantly, he rigged a city-wide contest so that his son would win, after HE screwed up and forgot to buy his kid a Christmas present! Then in a deleted after-credits scene, we find out he didn't get his wife anything either!!
I probably even missed a few, but you get the idea. Now I'm no policeman, but I have to think that with all of these crimes added together, this guy's gotta be looking at 10-15 years, MINIMUM! And what happens in the end? Because he's dressed in the costume of an American icon, he's carried away on the shoulders of the everyday citizen. I ask you, is this really how we want to treat such incredible offenses?
 |
| Sh*t just got real, eh Howie? |
And we haven't even mentioned Myron (Sinbad) the frickin' TERRORIST!! Am I the only one who thinks its a bit out of the ordinary that the guy threatens to blow up a radio station with a BOMB!? Oh, and then later actually BLOWS UP a police officer?! Yeah something tells me in post-9/11 times, that's gonna get you more than just a slap on the wrist before you strut home to your son with that action figure, pal.
And don't forget the attempted kidnapping of a child, and actual kidnapping of the actor who was supposed to play Dementor in the Christmas Eve parade! This guy is an openly admitted psychopath! He flat-out tells a group of police officers that he is mentally unstable! Sure he may be able to use that in court, but even if he gets off with an insanity plea, there is no way his son is staying in that household. Way to bust your ass for that toy, Myron, but you'll be going away for a long time.
 |
| Oops.... |
I'm sure you could do this for every movie under the sun, but this is just one example of how unsettling the consequences of the hero's actions can really be. Don't get me wrong, I'll never stop watching this movie, but its always fun to go all detective on this kind of stuff. But if you ask me, the REAL hero of this movie is the mother. Not only does she not commit one single misdeed against the law or her family, but she consistently defends her husband and puts her butt on the line while she KNOWS that he is consistently screwing up! That woman wins the award of movie hero in my book.
Have you ever noticed the hero being rewarded for severe law-breaking in your favorite movie(s)? Sound off in the comments below!
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
The Rise of the "Cinematic Universe"
 |
| Hulk meets with an exec from Disney |
In 2008, Marvel brought fan-favorite superhero Iron Man to the big screen in a very well done, seemingly stand-alone movie. The credits rolled, and fans were shocked and awed as the "Avengers" were mentioned in the post-credits scene. With this, Marvel broke into a whole new world of film-making: the cinematic universe.
That's not to say that there haven't been movies that don't have links, but this took the concept of "linking" movies to a whole new level. Later that same year, "The Incredible Hulk" was released, offering another glimpse by having Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man) appear in Hulk's post-credit scene. This is how Marvel really said they meant business. They didn't wait two years for another movie, they dominated the box office in one summer, and laid the groundwork for something much more than just a movie. Followed up with Iron Man 2 (2010), Thor (2011), and Captain America: The First Avenger (2011), Marvel had effectively buried rival DC Comics into the ground. (Don't get me wrong, DC did a fantastic job with the Dark Knight trilogy, but fell flat on their face in terms of beating Marvel to a Justice League movie)
Then, in 2012 (as we all know), Marvel laid the killing blow with The Avengers, which they had been building up to for the past 5 years. But now that the movie has come and gone, why keep going?
As a comic book fan, it's always really fun to see heroes cross over into each other's worlds. I always give a little squeal if I buy a new issue of Spider-Man and see that Iron Man makes an appearance, and so on. But when done in a big-budget, big-screen appearance, it becomes even more fun. Almost everybody who now goes to see a Marvel movie always stays behind after the credits for that little nugget of their next movie project.
 |
| Why is Cap's shield all segmented?? |
The second danger is what is currently happening ever since Disney bought out Marvel: over-franchising. The idea of a TV show spinning off from The Avengers sounds like a great idea, truly. It takes place in the exact same universe, and covers a lot of topics from the movie. But the danger is that it almost ruins how special the movies are. The reason the movies are so fun is because they don't come out every week, but instead we slobber and drool over images and trailers for several years before they're released. I've also noticed with this particular example that they keep name-dropping people like Cap and Thor, but you will never see them in the show. Its just a constant tease. This strategy obviously isn't working with Marvel, as ratings for the show revealed that 2/3 of the viewership stopped after the first episode. That's terrible.
DC Comics on the other hand, seems to be having great luck with TV shows. "Smallville" was a very successful show, chronicling the beginnings of Superman/Clark Kent, and spanning ten years on television. More recently, "Arrow", the origins and universe of superhero The Green Arrow/Oliver Queen has been very successful, and just began its second season. The Flash, along with several other large-name super heroes will be appearing on "Arrow" this season, and The Flash is even confirmed already for a spin-off TV show as well. They're also getting gutsier in the realm of movies, with the upcoming "Superman vs Batman" movie planned for 2015, and rumored to include Wonder Woman as well.
 |
| I could see this guy easily moving from TV to movie. |
It's no secret that I'm an Avengers/Marvel Comics junkie, but I've more recently been trying to expand my horizons into the realm of DC Comics as well.
On that note, I have this to say: Marvel, cancel "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., and halt all plans for your future TV shows including the (very poor idea for an) Agent Carter spin-off show. Its not what fans want, clearly. You're dangling a steak in front of the viewer, but slipping them a slice of olive loaf. Its not working. And to DC Comics: You're kicking Marvel's ass in television, and building a solid universe with the potential for believable crossover and continuity. But you're too late on the "Origin story movie" train. We all know you're using "Superman Vs Batman" as a test to see if a Justice League movie would be any good. My advice is that you don't make any other movies between the release of "SvB" and "Justice League." Until then, stick with TV shows, you're doing those right.
What do you think? Is the cinematic universe the wave of the future, or is it already dying? Sound off in the comments below!
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
2013 Holiday Movie Guide
It's almost the most wonderful time of the year...again! And after we successfully wade through a pile of shitty "horror" movies in mid-late October (along with the one they seemingly always do right around Christmastime for some reason), it'll be time for AWESOME HOLIDAY MOVIES!
Here's a quick guide of my holiday picks for this year:
CLICK ON THE NAMES OF THE MOVIES BELOW TO WATCH THE TRAILERS
NOVEMBER:
About Time - The love story of a twenty-something man who finds out he can go back in time and re-live moments of his life, deciding to use this gift only to serve his own "happily ever after."
Ender's Game - The movie adaptation of the famous Orson Scott Card book about a young boy bred to stop an unstoppable war.
Thor: The Dark World - Continuing Thor's journey after The Avengers, a war is brewing on both Earth and in Asgard, and Thor has to stop it.
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire - Second in the Hunger Games series, Katniss and Peta are called back into the perilous Hunger Games, but civil unrest is brewing behind the scenes.
Oldboy - The American rendition of the cult classic Korean film of the same name, a man is inexplicably held captive for two decades, then suddenly let loose to find out who did it, and why.
Frozen - From Disney comes the story about two princesses, and the quest of one to stop the other from creating an eternal winter.
DECEMBER:
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug - Second in the trilogy of The Hobbit movies. Spiders, dragons, orcs, and more stand between the heroes and their goal.
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues - The story of Ron Burgandy and the evening news team continues into the 1980's, adding a host of new characters, as they start work for a 24 hour news channel.
47 Ronin - Keannu Reeves directs and stars in a visually stunning retelling of the story of a group of masterless samurai seeking revenge on an evil dictator in ancient Japan.
Here's a quick guide of my holiday picks for this year:
CLICK ON THE NAMES OF THE MOVIES BELOW TO WATCH THE TRAILERS
NOVEMBER:
About Time - The love story of a twenty-something man who finds out he can go back in time and re-live moments of his life, deciding to use this gift only to serve his own "happily ever after."
Ender's Game - The movie adaptation of the famous Orson Scott Card book about a young boy bred to stop an unstoppable war.
Thor: The Dark World - Continuing Thor's journey after The Avengers, a war is brewing on both Earth and in Asgard, and Thor has to stop it.
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire - Second in the Hunger Games series, Katniss and Peta are called back into the perilous Hunger Games, but civil unrest is brewing behind the scenes.
Oldboy - The American rendition of the cult classic Korean film of the same name, a man is inexplicably held captive for two decades, then suddenly let loose to find out who did it, and why.
Frozen - From Disney comes the story about two princesses, and the quest of one to stop the other from creating an eternal winter.
DECEMBER:
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug - Second in the trilogy of The Hobbit movies. Spiders, dragons, orcs, and more stand between the heroes and their goal.
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues - The story of Ron Burgandy and the evening news team continues into the 1980's, adding a host of new characters, as they start work for a 24 hour news channel.
47 Ronin - Keannu Reeves directs and stars in a visually stunning retelling of the story of a group of masterless samurai seeking revenge on an evil dictator in ancient Japan.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)