And we're back! After taking a look at the upcoming movies from January - March of this year, let's take a look at April, May, and June! Summer blockbusters, aaaaaw yeah!
As usual, the trailer for each movie is linked to the title (if trailers are available for that movie).
April:
4/4
-Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Ehem...as some of you may know, I'm a bit of a Cap fan...so my feelings on this movie are grossly biased. BUT I will still say something in more of an impartial light: Its being described as more of a "political thriller/action" so expect something much deeper than just *POW POW*. It picks up two years after the events of "The Avengers" with Cap struggling to adapt to modern society. Personally, I'll be first in line.
4/11
-Draft Day
Ugh...the only thing more boring to me than sports, is sports movies. Kevin Costner and Jennifer Garner star in a movie about a sports manager for a football team. Watch the trailer, because I don't really care.
-Oculus
Horror movie. Surprise.
-Rio 2
I love animated movies, but they really have to try hard to stand out nowadays. I never saw the first Rio. The visuals look good, but the story just doesn't seem to stand out to me. Either way, I may watch it if its on TV sometime.
4/16
-Heaven Is For Real
Based on the book of the same name (I knew that thanks to my awesome book-loving wife), this story is based on the true story of a young boy who has a near-death experience, and sees heaven, which affects the lives of his friends and family. As a Lutheran, I'm a bit skeptical since I've never read the book, but I may actually give this one a try. The movie stars Greg Kinnear, a personal favorite of mine.
4/17
-Transcendence
Johnny Depp stars in a near-future science fiction epic where his character melds his brain with a machine to create the ultimate artificial intelligence. Seems like it will be somewhat political, but with a supporting cast including Morgan Freeman and Paul Bettany, I'm pretty intrigued! The feel of the trailer reminds me vaguely of the early 2000's movie A.I. mixed with the Terminator franchise.
4/25
-The Other Woman
Occasionally I enjoy a good chick flick, and the plot of this one honestly gave me a chuckle. Three girls all being played by the same guy decide to get their revenge. Not a fan of any of the actresses though, and the fact that Nicki Manaj exists in a movie turned me off 100% instantly. Just saying.
May:
5/2
-The Amazing Spider-Man 2
A lot of people I've talked to actually don't like the new Spider-Man movie as much as the old Toby Macguire series, but personally I adored the first Andrew Garfield one. This guy IS Peter Parker. I'm extremely excited for this movie! Villains inlude Rhino, Electro, and Green Goblin, and talent includes Paul Giamatti, and Jamie Foxx.
5/9
-Legends of Oz: Dorothy's Return
Starring Patrick Stewart, Dan Aackroyd, Jim Belushi and Kelsey Grammar, this is an animated "sequel" to the original Wizard of Oz. Personally I feel like the animation is just awful compared to what movies nowadays have been able to do. I mean look at Frozen, or even re-watch the trailer for Rio 2, they look ten times more detailed. Plus, why do we need a sequel to Wizard of Oz? The whole thing just feels totally unnecessary.
-Neighbors
A couple consisting of new parents and a young baby have new neighbors move in next door: a fraternity of loud, partying college guys. Hilarity ensues as the couple wages an all-out prank war against the frat, but the college guys retaliate with force. This looks to be a raunchy comedy, but the trailer sets up some great jokes! It's Seth Rogen vs Zac Effron!
5/16
-Godzilla
I've never really been big into Godzilla in the past, but I've always enjoyed gigantic monster movies like Cloverfield. This homage to the original Godzilla, with modern day special effects, looks down right spectacular! That monster legitimately scared me when I first saw this trailer! This movie carries a much MUCH darker tone than the 2000 film starring Matthew Broderick, as well as a big name cast including Bryan Cranston, and Ken Watanabe.
5/23
-X-Men: Days of Future Past
Did you like the original Bryan Singer-directed X-Men movies from the early 2000's? How about the more recent X-Men: First Class? If you liked either or both of those, chances are you'll be interested in Days of Future Past. I've always loved the X-Men, so I have high hopes for this movie. Recently they've released a lot of images of the various characters in the movie, and frankly a lot of their costumes just plain SUCK. I'll still see it though!
5/30
-A Million Ways to Die in the West
Directed and written by Seth McFarlane (Family Guy, Ted) and starring a lot of big names including Liam Neeson, Neil Patrick Harris, Charlize Theron, Sarah Silverman, and more, this movie is just going to be a gory, curse-filled, sex-joke-filled, most likely nudity-filled, probably drug and alcohol-filled mess. If you're into South Park and Family Guy, probably right up your alley.
-Filth
Based on a book written by Irivne Welsh, the author of Trainspotting, you can expect about the same. The movie looks grossly inappropriate, but in a much more demented way than your usual R-rated comedy. James Macavoy stars as a corrupted cop in Scotland. Be warned, the trailer is pretty R-rated in its own right.
-Maleficent
Angelina Jolie stars as the title character in this live-action adaptation of the famous Disney villain. The visuals look stunning, but I wish they had chosen a different lead actress. This is another one of those movies where it very well may be great, but it just feels kind of unnecessary. The visuals, though....wow.
June:
6/6
-Edge of Tomorrow
Tom Cruise is nuts as a person. The guy is just crazy. But when it comes to action movies, he can act his ass off! I love every modern Tom Cruise action movie, and Edge of Tomorrow looks very promising. He stars as a soldier who is cursed to re-live the same failed military invasion every day of his life. It's like Groundhog Day meets the video game Starcraft.
6/13
-22 Jump Street
Good god. Why is this a thing?
-How to Train Your Dragon 2
Remember what I said like 4 movies ago about how you need to make your animated movies stand out somehow since there are so many nowadays? Yeah. This movie is how you do it. The first How to Train Your Dragon is fantastic, and this just...wow. I can't wait for this movie. Just watch the trailer, it speaks for itself.
6/20
-The Purge: Anarchy
Another horror movie, yes. But the premise actually has me interested for once! This movie is a sequel to the 2013 film The Purge, in which America is a dominant world power with a strong economy, and almost nonexistent crime rate. This is achieved through The Purge: an annual event where for 8 hours, all crime is completely legal. I ignored the first film because it was your basic "we're being stalked" horror. The sequel however tasks a group with reaching a building across town, and having to survive The Purge. The plot sounds very much like a Hunger Games type of survival movie. There is no trailer as of yet, but if you click here, I placed a link for a trailer for the first movie.
6/27
-Transformers: Age of Extinction
Its the same as the first three, but with no Shia LeBeof. Big whoop.
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
The LEGO Movie
I still haven't forgotten about my 2014 movie preview! I promise! Besides you're all set until March anyways so what are you complaining about?!
Anywho...this is one of those rare opportunities where I got to see a movie within a week of it's theatrical release, and I couldn't WAIT to review it!
The LEGO Movie
(PG) 2013
Starring:
Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Arnett, Alison Brie, Charlie Day, Liam Neeson, Will Ferrell, Morgan Freeman, Will Forte, Nick Offerman, Shaquile O'Neal, Billy Dee Williams, Cobie Smulders, and on and on AND ON!!
The Plot:
Based on the popular children's toy, the movie is set in a LEGO world and follows the story of Emmett (Chris Pratt, Parks & Recreation), a regular guy who follows the instructions. He soon finds himself being looked up to as "The Special", the one who will save the LEGO world from evil Lord Business (Will Ferrell, Anchorman). With the help of his fellow master builders (including, but not limited to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, NBA all-stars, Batman, Superman, and several surprise guests I don't want to spoil here).
The Good:
Where do I begin? No seriously, this movie is fantastic! Most animated movies in this day and age throw in a few subtle jokes for the adults, or try to fill in the gaps with needless potty humor and fart jokes. This movie had me in stitches even during its most "serious" moments, and I can say the same for every single other adult in the theater (which was just about everyone).
The movie is animated very well. It's made using a mix of stop-motion and computer animation, resulting in some spectacular shots, and some hilarious moments. The water in the movie was probably the most visually incredible, if not a bit trippy. Anyone who has interest in the animation aspect of movies will greatly enjoy seeing how the obviously plastic figures move and interact.
The voice acting is also superb, and even the voice actors that I can't stand (coughJONAH HILLcough) had some great lines that were very well performed. The star-studded cast kept on coming until the very end, and even led to some unsuspected and wonderful twists in the last half hour.
Usually I'm not one in support of the "moral of the story" of movies like this. But the "anyone can be creative" and "you're all special" messages were so subtle, yet just obvious enough that it ties the whole movie together.
The Bad:
Honestly, while the movie comes in at a respectable 1 hour and 40 minutes, it felt a bit rushed at times. The very beginning of the movie shoots through the introduction of the world, and came close to feeling overwhelming.
My only other complaint (and I'm REALLY reaching for complaints) is that the LEGO universe is so expansive nowadays that I felt that there were some missed opportunities. Some of the most subtle references had me laughing the most, but there were so many LEGO sets that could have been included, but I feel like they weren't just because of the companies in charge of making the movie. (e.g. Warner Brothers had a hand, which means they'd include a ton of DC Comics characters, but without the rights to any Marvel Comics characters, even though there are plenty of Marvel LEGO sets).
But again, I'm trying hard to find things to complain about, and if that's the best I can muster, that should tell you something! Besides, there's always room in the sequel, eh?
Verdict:
10 awesome overpriced LEGO sets out of 10
As the movie's song says, "Everything Is Awesome."
Anywho...this is one of those rare opportunities where I got to see a movie within a week of it's theatrical release, and I couldn't WAIT to review it!
The LEGO Movie
(PG) 2013
Starring:
Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Arnett, Alison Brie, Charlie Day, Liam Neeson, Will Ferrell, Morgan Freeman, Will Forte, Nick Offerman, Shaquile O'Neal, Billy Dee Williams, Cobie Smulders, and on and on AND ON!!
The Plot:
Based on the popular children's toy, the movie is set in a LEGO world and follows the story of Emmett (Chris Pratt, Parks & Recreation), a regular guy who follows the instructions. He soon finds himself being looked up to as "The Special", the one who will save the LEGO world from evil Lord Business (Will Ferrell, Anchorman). With the help of his fellow master builders (including, but not limited to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, NBA all-stars, Batman, Superman, and several surprise guests I don't want to spoil here).
The Good:
Where do I begin? No seriously, this movie is fantastic! Most animated movies in this day and age throw in a few subtle jokes for the adults, or try to fill in the gaps with needless potty humor and fart jokes. This movie had me in stitches even during its most "serious" moments, and I can say the same for every single other adult in the theater (which was just about everyone).
The movie is animated very well. It's made using a mix of stop-motion and computer animation, resulting in some spectacular shots, and some hilarious moments. The water in the movie was probably the most visually incredible, if not a bit trippy. Anyone who has interest in the animation aspect of movies will greatly enjoy seeing how the obviously plastic figures move and interact.
The voice acting is also superb, and even the voice actors that I can't stand (coughJONAH HILLcough) had some great lines that were very well performed. The star-studded cast kept on coming until the very end, and even led to some unsuspected and wonderful twists in the last half hour.
Usually I'm not one in support of the "moral of the story" of movies like this. But the "anyone can be creative" and "you're all special" messages were so subtle, yet just obvious enough that it ties the whole movie together.
The Bad:
Honestly, while the movie comes in at a respectable 1 hour and 40 minutes, it felt a bit rushed at times. The very beginning of the movie shoots through the introduction of the world, and came close to feeling overwhelming.
My only other complaint (and I'm REALLY reaching for complaints) is that the LEGO universe is so expansive nowadays that I felt that there were some missed opportunities. Some of the most subtle references had me laughing the most, but there were so many LEGO sets that could have been included, but I feel like they weren't just because of the companies in charge of making the movie. (e.g. Warner Brothers had a hand, which means they'd include a ton of DC Comics characters, but without the rights to any Marvel Comics characters, even though there are plenty of Marvel LEGO sets).
But again, I'm trying hard to find things to complain about, and if that's the best I can muster, that should tell you something! Besides, there's always room in the sequel, eh?
Verdict:
10 awesome overpriced LEGO sets out of 10
As the movie's song says, "Everything Is Awesome."
Monday, January 20, 2014
The FP
Hey folks! I haven't forgotten about my 2014 year of movies previews, but I watched a movie last night that I just had to review. Check out..."The FP"
The FP
(R) 2013
Starring:
Jason Trost, Lee Valmassy, Art Hsu, Caitlyn Folley
If you liked...:
Idiocracy, Malibu's Most Wanted, Grindhouse, Army of Darkness, The Warriors
What's it about?:
In a near-future "post-apocalypse" wasteland, two gangs fight for dominance of Frazier Park (the FP), where gang members compete by playing "Beat Beat Revalation" (a parody of Dance Dance Revolution) against each other, sometimes with deadly consequences. No. I'm not making this up.
Are you serious...?:
Yes. And most importantly, DO NOT go into this movie with high expectations of Oscar-worthy performances, massive plot twists, etc. It's purely what it was made to be: a weird, hilarious, "watch it once and be done with it" kind of movie.
For anyone familiar with their work, myself not included, the movie is typical M.O. for the Trost brothers (directors), whose movies tend to be off-the-wall, inappropriate B-movies.
The Good:
The plot is absolutely ludicrous. The acting is purposefully bad, and the characters are just weird. You'll hear more curse words in the first scene of the movie than you'll probably hear in the entirety of any other movie this year. But this movie is by no means bad! I mean, its not an award winner, but it is made to be ridiculous, and it succeeds very well.
To get an idea of what you're in for, picture "Mad Max" with a dose of "Rocky" and topped with a sprinkle of "The Warriors", if all of those movies took place in an arcade in the late 1990's.
After a few instances of sighing, "Whaaaaat....?" I finally just gave in to the goofy insanity that the movie had to offer. If you don't just enjoy the ride for the crazy that it is, you won't like it. But by the end of the first scene, I had to keep watching, and it was definitely worth it.
Outside of the goofiness, the visuals were, for such an extremely low budget movie, very appropriate, and well done. Whereas the synopsis states that the movie is supposed to be "post-apocalyptic", I'd more so classify it as the American south in about 50 years. The cage match-style "Beat Beat Revelation" scenes were always a lot of fun, and filled with color, in a 80s-meets-2013 sort of way.
The Bad:
As mentioned before, if you're not a fan of vulgar movies, steer clear . As an R-rated movie, there are a few scenes with some brief nudity, and some odd sexual content, but again, they're all very brief, and if you've seen an R-rated movie in the past, its nothing surprising. I expected it to be WAY raunchier than it turned out to be, honestly. A couple of vomit scenes too, which felt unnecessary, but then again almost everything did at some point.
Outside of that, I can't really complain about this movie, not because it was astoundingly great, but because it wasn't trying to be. If I caught myself saying the acting was bad, its because it was meant to be bad. If I thought the plot was extremely predictable, its because it was parodying the predictable plots of countless movies before it.
If you really want to give this movie a chance, I cannot stress enough how much you have to just let loose and not think so hard. If you want a deep movie, throw in "The Shawshank Redemption." If you want goofy, one-time hilarity, try "The FP." And guess what?! IT'S ON NETFLIX! (Seriously...I need an endorsement deal...)
Verdict:
7 awesome dance moves out of 10
Good, not great. Very fun once, but I can't see myself watching it again in the near future. It's a parody for the sake of parody.
The FP
(R) 2013
Starring:
Jason Trost, Lee Valmassy, Art Hsu, Caitlyn Folley
If you liked...:
Idiocracy, Malibu's Most Wanted, Grindhouse, Army of Darkness, The Warriors
What's it about?:
In a near-future "post-apocalypse" wasteland, two gangs fight for dominance of Frazier Park (the FP), where gang members compete by playing "Beat Beat Revalation" (a parody of Dance Dance Revolution) against each other, sometimes with deadly consequences. No. I'm not making this up.
Are you serious...?:
Yes. And most importantly, DO NOT go into this movie with high expectations of Oscar-worthy performances, massive plot twists, etc. It's purely what it was made to be: a weird, hilarious, "watch it once and be done with it" kind of movie.
For anyone familiar with their work, myself not included, the movie is typical M.O. for the Trost brothers (directors), whose movies tend to be off-the-wall, inappropriate B-movies.
The Good:
The plot is absolutely ludicrous. The acting is purposefully bad, and the characters are just weird. You'll hear more curse words in the first scene of the movie than you'll probably hear in the entirety of any other movie this year. But this movie is by no means bad! I mean, its not an award winner, but it is made to be ridiculous, and it succeeds very well.
To get an idea of what you're in for, picture "Mad Max" with a dose of "Rocky" and topped with a sprinkle of "The Warriors", if all of those movies took place in an arcade in the late 1990's.
 |
| BTRO (left) dance battles L Dubba E (right) |
After a few instances of sighing, "Whaaaaat....?" I finally just gave in to the goofy insanity that the movie had to offer. If you don't just enjoy the ride for the crazy that it is, you won't like it. But by the end of the first scene, I had to keep watching, and it was definitely worth it.
Outside of the goofiness, the visuals were, for such an extremely low budget movie, very appropriate, and well done. Whereas the synopsis states that the movie is supposed to be "post-apocalyptic", I'd more so classify it as the American south in about 50 years. The cage match-style "Beat Beat Revelation" scenes were always a lot of fun, and filled with color, in a 80s-meets-2013 sort of way.
The Bad:
As mentioned before, if you're not a fan of vulgar movies, steer clear . As an R-rated movie, there are a few scenes with some brief nudity, and some odd sexual content, but again, they're all very brief, and if you've seen an R-rated movie in the past, its nothing surprising. I expected it to be WAY raunchier than it turned out to be, honestly. A couple of vomit scenes too, which felt unnecessary, but then again almost everything did at some point.
Outside of that, I can't really complain about this movie, not because it was astoundingly great, but because it wasn't trying to be. If I caught myself saying the acting was bad, its because it was meant to be bad. If I thought the plot was extremely predictable, its because it was parodying the predictable plots of countless movies before it.
| JTRO, the protagonist |
Verdict:
7 awesome dance moves out of 10
Good, not great. Very fun once, but I can't see myself watching it again in the near future. It's a parody for the sake of parody.
Monday, January 6, 2014
2014 Movie Guide part 1
Another holiday season has come and gone, and with it, all the best movies of the year. I have to admit, 2013 was pretty lackluster for movies if I do say so myself, but that said I am REALLY looking forward to 2014! From the upcoming summer hits like Amazing Spider-Man 2, to next holiday's sure-to-be smashes like the final Hobbit film, it's sure to be a good one!
That said, I'm guessing that those two that I mentioned are probably the highlights that most people know about. So today I'm going to be covering part one of my 2014 movie preview! So let's get started with January - March. And because I love you all sooo much, I've linked trailers to each movie if you click the titles! Enjoy!
I bet January will be great! I can't wait for January's awesome movies!
JANUARY:
1/2
-Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
Oh...another found-footage horror movie? This is also the 6th Paranormal Activity movie? Huh. Well, they can't all be winners, but I'm sure the rest of the month will be good!
1/9
-The Legend of Hercules
Huh. The first of two Hercules movies coming out in 2014, which is blatantly ripping off every scene from "300"...mmmkay so again maybe not a super original way to start the year, but let's move on.
1/17
-Devil's Due
A...another crappy Paranormal Activity-type horror movie? Two in the first month...um, okay, this isn't going well but I'm SURE there's one good one in January!
-Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
Super-spy being chased by his own government, and doesn't know why...so, its just a Bourne movie? Wow, this is a bad start. But hey, we've got one more super hyped movie, I bet its totally original! I still have faith!
1/24
-I, Frankenstein
*sigh* From the producers of Underworld comes...Underworld, but this time starring the guy who played Two-Face in "The Dark Knight".
So all-in-all, every hyped movie in January is utter crap, and is in some way totally copying or ripping off something else in a huge way, with absolutely ZERO originality. Crap. Well, let's leave this garbage month behind, and see what February has...surely something note-worthy?!
FEBRUARY:
2/7
-The LEGO Movie
Awww yeah! Here we go! A HUGE cast of voice actors in a movie about one of the most popular toys of all time! This movie looks great, and the trailers seem to market it as one of those kids movies that will have plenty of jokes for the adults too. The movie will be featuring LEGO versions of hundreds of characters, including Batman, Superman, Ninja Turtles, several pro athletes, Abraham Lincoln, and many many more.
-The Monuments Men
Starring George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, and more, this movie is not your typical World War 2 shoot-em-up. It tells the true story of a group of art historians who were sent into Italy in WW2 to obtain as many timeless pieces of art as they could from out of the Nazi's hands. Definitely going to see this one!
2/12
-RoboCop
A reboot, with a very iffy mix of reactions so far, RoboCop brings a big-name cast (including Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson, and Gary Oldman) to re-tell the origin of the futuristic cyborg law-bringer. I'll reserve judgement, as it looks good, but I know how hard it's been in the past for companies to reboot 80's action flicks.
-Vampire Academy
Ugh. The preview basically tells me that its Twilight, but trying to be sexier. In other words, a bunch of 17 year olds sucking each other's necks. Pass. But I figured I'd mention it since I'm sure you'll all be seeing countless commercials for it in the coming weeks.
2/21
-Pompeii
Another movie ripping off every famous scene from "300" from the looks of it. As the title implies, it tells the story of the destruction of Pompeii, but with all the slow-motion and streams of blood ripped off from every other movie made in this time period from the past 6 or 7 years. I may watch it if it ever goes on Netflix, but if I want to see the same shots over and over, I'll just watch "300" again. Y'know, a quick side-note here: "Troy" managed to pull off that time period just as well as "300" and without all the unnecessary Zack Snyder trademarks of slow-motion blood and sex scenes...I'm really excited for when movies STOP ripping off the Snyder style.
-The Wind Rises
Ok, after the few weeks of boredom there after you all went to see the "LEGO Movie", now we can all return to theaters to see Miyazaki's final masterpiece. If you've seen any of his past movies (My Neighbor Totoro, Ponyo, Howl's Moving Castle, etc.) you'll know what to expect, because Miyazaki never disappoints!
2/28
-Son of God
Uh oh...a Biblical movie. Don't get me wrong, as a Lutheran I have absolutely nothing wrong with spreading the word through the big-screen, and I remember how big of an impact "Passion of the Christ" made. But that said, this movie looks like it may be foregoing the actual Bible in some areas, just to draw in a bigger crowd. I'm hopeful, but very wary on this one...
MARCH:
3/7
-300: Rise Of An Empire
Ooooh JOY. We're only in March, and we already have three movies based in the time period of ancient Greece, and with the exact same visual style. From the same director as the original "300" comes an extremely unnecessary, money-grubbing sequel. Just re-watch the original "300".
-The Grand Budapest Hotel
Here we go, something good! This is the newest film from director Wes Anderson, one of my favorites. If you've seen his past movies (The Royal Tennenbaums, Rushmore, The Life Aquatic) you know who will star in it, and what it'll be like. Although this one does add some actors relatively new to Wes Anderson, such as Ralph Fiennes, and Edward Norton!
-Journey To The West
From the makers of "Kung Fu Hustle" comes pretty much Kung Fu Hustle 2. I love Stephen Chow's movies, they're always a really absurd mix of kung fu, and slapstick comedy that I can only describe as what an anime would look like if it were filmed in live-action. Go watch "Kung Fu Hustle" and if you like it, you'll probably like this!
-Mr. Peabody & Sherman
An unnecessary 3D adaptation of a really old cartoon. Pass.
3/14
-Need for Speed
Starring the guy who played Jesse on "Breaking Bad" comes the closest thing you'll get to "Fast & Furious 7" this year. Fast cars, explosions, most likely women in short skirts. Enough said.
-Tyler Perry's Single Mom's Club
WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP SEEING THESE?! Tyler Perry...STAAAAHP!!!
3/21
-Muppets Most Wanted
Following the surprising success of the most recent Muppets movie, comes another star-studded family adventure! I'm looking forward to watching Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, and more interact with Kermit and his pals. I'll be seeing this one early on!
3/28
-Noah
Aaand here's our second Biblical adaptation of the year. I'm VERY wary of this one. It looks cool because of the big-name cast and very nice special effects, but from what I've read of the synopsis, they stray waaaaaay away from the actual Bible story of the flood. We'll have to see about this one...
PHEW! There you are, the biggest upcoming movies from January through March. Keep a lookout soon for part two, and sound off in the comments if I missed any that you've been looking forward to!
That said, I'm guessing that those two that I mentioned are probably the highlights that most people know about. So today I'm going to be covering part one of my 2014 movie preview! So let's get started with January - March. And because I love you all sooo much, I've linked trailers to each movie if you click the titles! Enjoy!
I bet January will be great! I can't wait for January's awesome movies!
JANUARY:
1/2
-Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
Oh...another found-footage horror movie? This is also the 6th Paranormal Activity movie? Huh. Well, they can't all be winners, but I'm sure the rest of the month will be good!
1/9
-The Legend of Hercules
Huh. The first of two Hercules movies coming out in 2014, which is blatantly ripping off every scene from "300"...mmmkay so again maybe not a super original way to start the year, but let's move on.
1/17
-Devil's Due
A...another crappy Paranormal Activity-type horror movie? Two in the first month...um, okay, this isn't going well but I'm SURE there's one good one in January!
-Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
Super-spy being chased by his own government, and doesn't know why...so, its just a Bourne movie? Wow, this is a bad start. But hey, we've got one more super hyped movie, I bet its totally original! I still have faith!
1/24
-I, Frankenstein
*sigh* From the producers of Underworld comes...Underworld, but this time starring the guy who played Two-Face in "The Dark Knight".
So all-in-all, every hyped movie in January is utter crap, and is in some way totally copying or ripping off something else in a huge way, with absolutely ZERO originality. Crap. Well, let's leave this garbage month behind, and see what February has...surely something note-worthy?!
FEBRUARY:
2/7
-The LEGO Movie
Awww yeah! Here we go! A HUGE cast of voice actors in a movie about one of the most popular toys of all time! This movie looks great, and the trailers seem to market it as one of those kids movies that will have plenty of jokes for the adults too. The movie will be featuring LEGO versions of hundreds of characters, including Batman, Superman, Ninja Turtles, several pro athletes, Abraham Lincoln, and many many more.
-The Monuments Men
Starring George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, and more, this movie is not your typical World War 2 shoot-em-up. It tells the true story of a group of art historians who were sent into Italy in WW2 to obtain as many timeless pieces of art as they could from out of the Nazi's hands. Definitely going to see this one!
2/12
-RoboCop
A reboot, with a very iffy mix of reactions so far, RoboCop brings a big-name cast (including Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson, and Gary Oldman) to re-tell the origin of the futuristic cyborg law-bringer. I'll reserve judgement, as it looks good, but I know how hard it's been in the past for companies to reboot 80's action flicks.
-Vampire Academy
Ugh. The preview basically tells me that its Twilight, but trying to be sexier. In other words, a bunch of 17 year olds sucking each other's necks. Pass. But I figured I'd mention it since I'm sure you'll all be seeing countless commercials for it in the coming weeks.
2/21
-Pompeii
Another movie ripping off every famous scene from "300" from the looks of it. As the title implies, it tells the story of the destruction of Pompeii, but with all the slow-motion and streams of blood ripped off from every other movie made in this time period from the past 6 or 7 years. I may watch it if it ever goes on Netflix, but if I want to see the same shots over and over, I'll just watch "300" again. Y'know, a quick side-note here: "Troy" managed to pull off that time period just as well as "300" and without all the unnecessary Zack Snyder trademarks of slow-motion blood and sex scenes...I'm really excited for when movies STOP ripping off the Snyder style.
-The Wind Rises
Ok, after the few weeks of boredom there after you all went to see the "LEGO Movie", now we can all return to theaters to see Miyazaki's final masterpiece. If you've seen any of his past movies (My Neighbor Totoro, Ponyo, Howl's Moving Castle, etc.) you'll know what to expect, because Miyazaki never disappoints!
2/28
-Son of God
Uh oh...a Biblical movie. Don't get me wrong, as a Lutheran I have absolutely nothing wrong with spreading the word through the big-screen, and I remember how big of an impact "Passion of the Christ" made. But that said, this movie looks like it may be foregoing the actual Bible in some areas, just to draw in a bigger crowd. I'm hopeful, but very wary on this one...
MARCH:
3/7
-300: Rise Of An Empire
Ooooh JOY. We're only in March, and we already have three movies based in the time period of ancient Greece, and with the exact same visual style. From the same director as the original "300" comes an extremely unnecessary, money-grubbing sequel. Just re-watch the original "300".
-The Grand Budapest Hotel
Here we go, something good! This is the newest film from director Wes Anderson, one of my favorites. If you've seen his past movies (The Royal Tennenbaums, Rushmore, The Life Aquatic) you know who will star in it, and what it'll be like. Although this one does add some actors relatively new to Wes Anderson, such as Ralph Fiennes, and Edward Norton!
-Journey To The West
From the makers of "Kung Fu Hustle" comes pretty much Kung Fu Hustle 2. I love Stephen Chow's movies, they're always a really absurd mix of kung fu, and slapstick comedy that I can only describe as what an anime would look like if it were filmed in live-action. Go watch "Kung Fu Hustle" and if you like it, you'll probably like this!
-Mr. Peabody & Sherman
An unnecessary 3D adaptation of a really old cartoon. Pass.
3/14
-Need for Speed
Starring the guy who played Jesse on "Breaking Bad" comes the closest thing you'll get to "Fast & Furious 7" this year. Fast cars, explosions, most likely women in short skirts. Enough said.
-Tyler Perry's Single Mom's Club
WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP SEEING THESE?! Tyler Perry...STAAAAHP!!!
3/21
-Muppets Most Wanted
Following the surprising success of the most recent Muppets movie, comes another star-studded family adventure! I'm looking forward to watching Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, and more interact with Kermit and his pals. I'll be seeing this one early on!
3/28
-Noah
Aaand here's our second Biblical adaptation of the year. I'm VERY wary of this one. It looks cool because of the big-name cast and very nice special effects, but from what I've read of the synopsis, they stray waaaaaay away from the actual Bible story of the flood. We'll have to see about this one...
PHEW! There you are, the biggest upcoming movies from January through March. Keep a lookout soon for part two, and sound off in the comments if I missed any that you've been looking forward to!
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Frozen
Its pretty rare that I actually get the chance to see a movie in theaters these days, so now that I finally did, here's what I thought of Disney's latest.
Frozen (PG)
Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk
Whats it about: Princess Anna embarks on a journey to help her sister Elsa, the rightful heir to their kingdom's throne, who possesses the magical power to produce snow/ice.
Going into this movie, I had no idea what the plot was, which was honestly rather refreshing! Its really difficult to describe the plot without giving anything away, because its a lot of fun to just discover it for yourself. Disney definitely knows what they're doing!
That said, there is a LOT of great stuff in this movie, but there was some stuff that bugged me too. But hey, lets start with the good:
This. Movie. Is. BEAUTIFUL. The animation of the characters is great, the snow is very well done, but what absolutely blew me away was the frost powers that Elsa wields. Wow! I didn't see this movie in 3D, but this is one of the only movies I've ever actually wished I did.
At one point in the movie, Elsa creates something very cool out of ice, and visually it gave me chills. Pixar never disappoints when it comes to looks, that's for sure.
Its no secret that Tangled is my absolute favorite Disney movie, in a large way due to the characters, and how they are a great mix of the classic prince/princess formula, and modern society. That is definitely visible in this movie as well. It seems that Disney princesses are taking a turn to become "like totally" teen girls, which is just as fun in Frozen as it was in Tangled. I wasn't disappointed by a single character. In typical Disney fashion, there's two hilarious non-human characters, Sven the reindeer, and Olaf the snowman. Honestly, when I saw the trailers I thought Olaf was going to be a completely idiotic character, I thought all his little quips were just terrible. But in the full movie, he had some of the best lines! He's pretty obviously just there for the kids, as he constantly points out major plot points in somewhat of an "In case you missed it" style. Its annoying, but hey, he serves his purpose.
Again, not going to spoil anything, but I loved the ending too! Throughout the final climax, I was sighing internally because I figured I knew exactly what was going to happen. Well I was wrong, and pleasantly surprised! They really push the sisterhood thing way more than the "true love" which is a refreshing change!
Okay I've covered all my favorite parts, but there were some things that still bugged me, and prevented me from truly loving this movie. For starters, the songs. Now don't get me wrong, I know Disney movies are no stranger to music, and actually I thought the songs were fantastic in Tangled! What I did feel about this movie, however, is that there were too many songs, and some of them felt really unnecessary. Half of them were just dialogue conversations that had music, and it just felt like they didn't need to be sung. I really liked some of the songs, especially the opening number, but overall I feel like if they toned it down by maybe 3 or 4 songs, it would have been a little better.
I also wasn't a big fan of Elsa's singing voice, but that's just personal preference, so ignore that if you want to.
Verdict: 7.5 out of 10. Definitely go see it! I like that it wasn't over-hyped like most Disney movies, and was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked the characters.
Remember to keep an eye out for some Disney cameos!
*P.S.: There is an extra scene after the credits*
BONUS ROUND: The short before the movie
I always love the short movies they play before each Disney/Pixar film. But sadly I gotta give this one a low grade. It's a fun homage to classic "steamboat willie"-era Disney cartoons, but compared to some of their other more recent shorts, like "Paperman" (shown before "Wreck-It Ralph"), or even "La Luna" (shown before "Brave") were much more enjoyable. They do have a small Marvel cameo that made me laugh pretty hard though, so keep an eye out!
6 out of 10 for the short. Good, not great.
Frozen (PG)
Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk
Whats it about: Princess Anna embarks on a journey to help her sister Elsa, the rightful heir to their kingdom's throne, who possesses the magical power to produce snow/ice.
Going into this movie, I had no idea what the plot was, which was honestly rather refreshing! Its really difficult to describe the plot without giving anything away, because its a lot of fun to just discover it for yourself. Disney definitely knows what they're doing!
That said, there is a LOT of great stuff in this movie, but there was some stuff that bugged me too. But hey, lets start with the good:
This. Movie. Is. BEAUTIFUL. The animation of the characters is great, the snow is very well done, but what absolutely blew me away was the frost powers that Elsa wields. Wow! I didn't see this movie in 3D, but this is one of the only movies I've ever actually wished I did.At one point in the movie, Elsa creates something very cool out of ice, and visually it gave me chills. Pixar never disappoints when it comes to looks, that's for sure.
Its no secret that Tangled is my absolute favorite Disney movie, in a large way due to the characters, and how they are a great mix of the classic prince/princess formula, and modern society. That is definitely visible in this movie as well. It seems that Disney princesses are taking a turn to become "like totally" teen girls, which is just as fun in Frozen as it was in Tangled. I wasn't disappointed by a single character. In typical Disney fashion, there's two hilarious non-human characters, Sven the reindeer, and Olaf the snowman. Honestly, when I saw the trailers I thought Olaf was going to be a completely idiotic character, I thought all his little quips were just terrible. But in the full movie, he had some of the best lines! He's pretty obviously just there for the kids, as he constantly points out major plot points in somewhat of an "In case you missed it" style. Its annoying, but hey, he serves his purpose.
Again, not going to spoil anything, but I loved the ending too! Throughout the final climax, I was sighing internally because I figured I knew exactly what was going to happen. Well I was wrong, and pleasantly surprised! They really push the sisterhood thing way more than the "true love" which is a refreshing change!
Okay I've covered all my favorite parts, but there were some things that still bugged me, and prevented me from truly loving this movie. For starters, the songs. Now don't get me wrong, I know Disney movies are no stranger to music, and actually I thought the songs were fantastic in Tangled! What I did feel about this movie, however, is that there were too many songs, and some of them felt really unnecessary. Half of them were just dialogue conversations that had music, and it just felt like they didn't need to be sung. I really liked some of the songs, especially the opening number, but overall I feel like if they toned it down by maybe 3 or 4 songs, it would have been a little better.I also wasn't a big fan of Elsa's singing voice, but that's just personal preference, so ignore that if you want to.
Verdict: 7.5 out of 10. Definitely go see it! I like that it wasn't over-hyped like most Disney movies, and was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked the characters.
Remember to keep an eye out for some Disney cameos!
*P.S.: There is an extra scene after the credits*
BONUS ROUND: The short before the movie
I always love the short movies they play before each Disney/Pixar film. But sadly I gotta give this one a low grade. It's a fun homage to classic "steamboat willie"-era Disney cartoons, but compared to some of their other more recent shorts, like "Paperman" (shown before "Wreck-It Ralph"), or even "La Luna" (shown before "Brave") were much more enjoyable. They do have a small Marvel cameo that made me laugh pretty hard though, so keep an eye out!
6 out of 10 for the short. Good, not great.
Monday, December 9, 2013
Something Old, Something New: 5 must-see past, and future setting movies
Hark! A moving picture!
'Tis truly rare that a lad such as I might become engrossed in such thrilling tales of olden days. Aye that this may be true, but whence I become enthralled, indeed yon films tend to linger in mine head! Travel with me now, to days of old, as we review my top 5 movies set in the distant past:
Red Cliff (2008)
When it was released, Red Cliff quickly became the highest grossing movie in China of all time. Produced by legendary action star John Woo, it tells the story of the Three Kingdoms era of Chinese history (one of my favorite time periods to study, so again kinda biased but who cares). This is a long movie, and even had to be cut down for the American version by several hours, and expanded into two parts, so I'll try to give a brief description of the plot:
After the fall of the Han dynasty, one of China's most prosperous times, the land was divided and left without central leadership. This led into the Three Kingdoms period, in which China was brutally battled over between three warlords, and several other smaller armies vying for power. Red Cliff takes place during one of the pivotal battles of this era, the battle of Red Cliff. There are a lot of characters to follow, but thats the gist.
Okay okay, so I kinda geeked out there, but for Pete's sake, I love this time period so much I almost studied Chinese history in college just so I could learn more! There have been a lot of movies set during the Three Kingdoms era within the past few years, (Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon, Red Cliff pt. 1 and 2, The Lost Bladesman, The Assassins, Little Big Soldier) but Red Cliff is by far the best. Just...go watch it. It's on Netflix, okay? GO!
Master & Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)
Russell Crowe and Paul Bettany take the lead in what I would easily consider my favorite historic movie. Set during the Napoleonic wars, the film follows Captain Jack Aubrey (Crowe), a British naval captain as he pursues a French ship containing sensitive information that could cost many lives if not stopped. Aside from the fantastic naval combat, every actor in the movie plays their part extraordinarily convincingly, leading to some wonderful, and some heart-breaking moments, surprisingly none of which involve any romance. Paul Bettany co-stars as Aubrey's long-time friend and the ships surgeon, Dr. Matruin. The back-and-forth between Crowe and Bettany progresses the story very well, even when cannonballs aren't flying.
The movie is fairly long, but I'd definitely call it a must-see, whether you're looking for drama, action, or story.
Gangs of New York (2002)
Set during the Civil War, the story revolves around the Five Points district of New York, during an ongoing dispute between U.S.-born Americans, and the rising swell of immigrants, being primarily Irish. Leonardo DiCaprio gives, what I feel is one of his strongest performances as Amsterdam Vallon, the son of the Irish immigrant's leader. After his father is killed by their rival gang's leader, Bill Cutting, a.k.a. The Butcher (played amazingly by Daniel Day Lewis) when he is a child, he seeks revenge by siding with The Butcher when he grows up. Cameron Diaz also stars, but honestly in my opinion she does a forgettable job.
Another fairly long, and dialogue heavy movie, but the constant stream of tense moments between Amsterdam and Bill lead up to a satisfying climax.
The Last Samurai (2003)
Tom Cruise movies are pretty iffy to me, but when he has a good movie, its fantastic! This is one of those times. The movie takes place during the initial Westernization of Japan, and follows U.S. military commander Nathan Algren as he is sent to instruct the Japanese armies on western military tactics. As the title hints, the time period also takes place during the end of the samurai era. Algren is captured during an initial battle with the samurai, and eventually comes to embrace their ways after meeting Katsumoto (played by Ken Watanabe, a phenomenal eastern actor), a high-ranking Samurai warrior.
The plot may be a little "Dances With Wolves/Pocahontas/Avatar/etc...", but its still a great ride. I'm kind of a sucker for Asian cinema, and this strikes a perfect balance between East/West, making it easy to follow whether or not you know anything about the time period.
Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
Musical, yes. Gory, yes. But great story and acting, most definitely! Rounding out my period-movies is Sweeny Todd. If you know Tim Burton, you know what this movie will look like, and who it'll star. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, it follows the story of Sweeny Todd, a man recently released from wrongful imprisonment in Industrial-age London. He seeks revenge on the man who wrongfully convicted him, and kills lots of people on the way, but that's not why he does it. He's just jaded and misunderstood. Great acting, good music, way on the gory side, so if you're squeamish, beware. All-in-all though, worth at least one watch!
Pretty soon, they'll beam it into your brain...
Now that we've successfully re-lived the past through some fantastic cinematic experiences, let's take a look at what the future holds! Whether travelling to far-off galaxies and meeting three-boobed alien prostitutes, or even here on the nuclear wasteland that is earth, the future holds some interesting potential. Let's take a look!
Equilibrium (2002)
Starring Christian Bale (before he was just the Batman guy) and Sean Bean (before he was the Game of Thrones guy), Equilibrium takes place in a dystopian future where all traces of emotion have been eliminated from life, leading to perfection and order. But, as there always is, there is resistance in the form of an underground movement who decides not to take their emotion-regulating pills. What follows is a predictable action movie, but with some spectacular visuals, and some of the coolest gun-play scenes I've seen in any movie. The main characters practice a form of gun-fu, basically just total ass-kickery, while wielding two pistols. Solid acting all around, definitely a fun movie. Its on Netflix, so no excuses!
The Fifth Element (1997)
Directed by Luc Besson (director of Leon: The Professional, and the upcoming film Lucy), and starring Bruce Willis (Die Hard) and Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil), this is one of my all-time favorites. Every 5,000 years, an ancient evil awakens to destroy humanity. And in futuristic New York, its up to former soldier, and current cab driver Korben Dallas (Willis) to save the day.
This movie is a pop culture gem, and nowadays has a huge pop culture following. Check it out (again, on Netflix) of you like comedy, action, romance, y'know what...just watch it. You'll like it, I promise.
Idiocracy (2006)
This is not your typical futuristic movie, but by far I find its the most accurate portrayal that I can imagine of the future. When an oafish army-man (Luke Wilson) is used in an experiment to freeze soldiers to be un-thawed in the future, he is accidentally frozen for hundreds of years. While he's frozen, the planet takes its natural course, and becomes filled with inbred, uneducated, beer chugging, Jackass-watching morons. The formerly not-so-bright soldier wakes up as the smartest person on the planet, which isn't saying much!
This movie has no small chunk of political commentary in it's quirky, dumb humor, but either way its very fun to watch the potential future where all water is replaced by energy drinks, the president is a former professional wrestler, and the popular restaurant Fuddrucker's has changed its name to....well, I'll let you find out. Its not hard.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
This may not be the typical flying cars, aliens and space-travel movie, but this near-future dark comedy is definitely worth checking out. Society is largely the same, except that everyone can get a procedure done that allows you to wipe your memory clean of certain events, or in this case, people. Jim Carrey (The Mask, Dumb & Dumber) stars, and goes through the process of having his ex-girlfriend wiped from his mind.
Visually, this is a movie you're going to want to pay attention for. There's a lot happening, but the way it all fits together is very interesting and unique. Very engrossing characters and a solid story equal a somewhat overlooked gem. Once again, its on Netflix.
Starship Troopers (1997)
Finally we have another cult classic space action movie. Known for the ironic and terrible acting, and based on a book that the movie plot has damn near nothing to do with, it follows Rico (Casper Van Dien) and his friends as they join the army to fight off a race of gigantic bug aliens. Its hard to describe this movie in a serious light, so I'm honestly going to just suggest you check it out (EHEM....ON NETFLIX, they should really be paying me for mentioning them so much).
NOTE: At least 7 of the 10 movies I discussed are on Netflix instant stream, so check them out. You don't even have to get up to buy/rent them!
'Tis truly rare that a lad such as I might become engrossed in such thrilling tales of olden days. Aye that this may be true, but whence I become enthralled, indeed yon films tend to linger in mine head! Travel with me now, to days of old, as we review my top 5 movies set in the distant past:
Red Cliff (2008)When it was released, Red Cliff quickly became the highest grossing movie in China of all time. Produced by legendary action star John Woo, it tells the story of the Three Kingdoms era of Chinese history (one of my favorite time periods to study, so again kinda biased but who cares). This is a long movie, and even had to be cut down for the American version by several hours, and expanded into two parts, so I'll try to give a brief description of the plot:
After the fall of the Han dynasty, one of China's most prosperous times, the land was divided and left without central leadership. This led into the Three Kingdoms period, in which China was brutally battled over between three warlords, and several other smaller armies vying for power. Red Cliff takes place during one of the pivotal battles of this era, the battle of Red Cliff. There are a lot of characters to follow, but thats the gist.
Okay okay, so I kinda geeked out there, but for Pete's sake, I love this time period so much I almost studied Chinese history in college just so I could learn more! There have been a lot of movies set during the Three Kingdoms era within the past few years, (Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon, Red Cliff pt. 1 and 2, The Lost Bladesman, The Assassins, Little Big Soldier) but Red Cliff is by far the best. Just...go watch it. It's on Netflix, okay? GO!
Master & Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)Russell Crowe and Paul Bettany take the lead in what I would easily consider my favorite historic movie. Set during the Napoleonic wars, the film follows Captain Jack Aubrey (Crowe), a British naval captain as he pursues a French ship containing sensitive information that could cost many lives if not stopped. Aside from the fantastic naval combat, every actor in the movie plays their part extraordinarily convincingly, leading to some wonderful, and some heart-breaking moments, surprisingly none of which involve any romance. Paul Bettany co-stars as Aubrey's long-time friend and the ships surgeon, Dr. Matruin. The back-and-forth between Crowe and Bettany progresses the story very well, even when cannonballs aren't flying.
The movie is fairly long, but I'd definitely call it a must-see, whether you're looking for drama, action, or story.
Gangs of New York (2002)Set during the Civil War, the story revolves around the Five Points district of New York, during an ongoing dispute between U.S.-born Americans, and the rising swell of immigrants, being primarily Irish. Leonardo DiCaprio gives, what I feel is one of his strongest performances as Amsterdam Vallon, the son of the Irish immigrant's leader. After his father is killed by their rival gang's leader, Bill Cutting, a.k.a. The Butcher (played amazingly by Daniel Day Lewis) when he is a child, he seeks revenge by siding with The Butcher when he grows up. Cameron Diaz also stars, but honestly in my opinion she does a forgettable job.
Another fairly long, and dialogue heavy movie, but the constant stream of tense moments between Amsterdam and Bill lead up to a satisfying climax.
The Last Samurai (2003)Tom Cruise movies are pretty iffy to me, but when he has a good movie, its fantastic! This is one of those times. The movie takes place during the initial Westernization of Japan, and follows U.S. military commander Nathan Algren as he is sent to instruct the Japanese armies on western military tactics. As the title hints, the time period also takes place during the end of the samurai era. Algren is captured during an initial battle with the samurai, and eventually comes to embrace their ways after meeting Katsumoto (played by Ken Watanabe, a phenomenal eastern actor), a high-ranking Samurai warrior.
The plot may be a little "Dances With Wolves/Pocahontas/Avatar/etc...", but its still a great ride. I'm kind of a sucker for Asian cinema, and this strikes a perfect balance between East/West, making it easy to follow whether or not you know anything about the time period.
Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)Musical, yes. Gory, yes. But great story and acting, most definitely! Rounding out my period-movies is Sweeny Todd. If you know Tim Burton, you know what this movie will look like, and who it'll star. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, it follows the story of Sweeny Todd, a man recently released from wrongful imprisonment in Industrial-age London. He seeks revenge on the man who wrongfully convicted him, and kills lots of people on the way, but that's not why he does it. He's just jaded and misunderstood. Great acting, good music, way on the gory side, so if you're squeamish, beware. All-in-all though, worth at least one watch!
Pretty soon, they'll beam it into your brain...
Now that we've successfully re-lived the past through some fantastic cinematic experiences, let's take a look at what the future holds! Whether travelling to far-off galaxies and meeting three-boobed alien prostitutes, or even here on the nuclear wasteland that is earth, the future holds some interesting potential. Let's take a look!
Equilibrium (2002)Starring Christian Bale (before he was just the Batman guy) and Sean Bean (before he was the Game of Thrones guy), Equilibrium takes place in a dystopian future where all traces of emotion have been eliminated from life, leading to perfection and order. But, as there always is, there is resistance in the form of an underground movement who decides not to take their emotion-regulating pills. What follows is a predictable action movie, but with some spectacular visuals, and some of the coolest gun-play scenes I've seen in any movie. The main characters practice a form of gun-fu, basically just total ass-kickery, while wielding two pistols. Solid acting all around, definitely a fun movie. Its on Netflix, so no excuses!
The Fifth Element (1997)Directed by Luc Besson (director of Leon: The Professional, and the upcoming film Lucy), and starring Bruce Willis (Die Hard) and Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil), this is one of my all-time favorites. Every 5,000 years, an ancient evil awakens to destroy humanity. And in futuristic New York, its up to former soldier, and current cab driver Korben Dallas (Willis) to save the day.
This movie is a pop culture gem, and nowadays has a huge pop culture following. Check it out (again, on Netflix) of you like comedy, action, romance, y'know what...just watch it. You'll like it, I promise.
Idiocracy (2006)This is not your typical futuristic movie, but by far I find its the most accurate portrayal that I can imagine of the future. When an oafish army-man (Luke Wilson) is used in an experiment to freeze soldiers to be un-thawed in the future, he is accidentally frozen for hundreds of years. While he's frozen, the planet takes its natural course, and becomes filled with inbred, uneducated, beer chugging, Jackass-watching morons. The formerly not-so-bright soldier wakes up as the smartest person on the planet, which isn't saying much!
This movie has no small chunk of political commentary in it's quirky, dumb humor, but either way its very fun to watch the potential future where all water is replaced by energy drinks, the president is a former professional wrestler, and the popular restaurant Fuddrucker's has changed its name to....well, I'll let you find out. Its not hard.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)This may not be the typical flying cars, aliens and space-travel movie, but this near-future dark comedy is definitely worth checking out. Society is largely the same, except that everyone can get a procedure done that allows you to wipe your memory clean of certain events, or in this case, people. Jim Carrey (The Mask, Dumb & Dumber) stars, and goes through the process of having his ex-girlfriend wiped from his mind.
Visually, this is a movie you're going to want to pay attention for. There's a lot happening, but the way it all fits together is very interesting and unique. Very engrossing characters and a solid story equal a somewhat overlooked gem. Once again, its on Netflix.
Starship Troopers (1997)Finally we have another cult classic space action movie. Known for the ironic and terrible acting, and based on a book that the movie plot has damn near nothing to do with, it follows Rico (Casper Van Dien) and his friends as they join the army to fight off a race of gigantic bug aliens. Its hard to describe this movie in a serious light, so I'm honestly going to just suggest you check it out (EHEM....ON NETFLIX, they should really be paying me for mentioning them so much).
NOTE: At least 7 of the 10 movies I discussed are on Netflix instant stream, so check them out. You don't even have to get up to buy/rent them!
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Upside Down
Y'know, its been a while since I straight-up reviewed a movie, so here you go!
Upside Down (2012)
PG-13
Starring: Jim Sturgess (Accross The Universe, 21), Kirsten Dunst (Spider-Man, Drop Dead Gorgeous), Timothy Spall (Harry Potter series)
What its all about: In one sentence, picture the special effects of "Inception" meets the basic forbidden love plot of "Romeo & Juliet" and you have "Upside Down". Adam and Eden live on two separate planets that share a gravitational pole, except that they're reversed. Eden's planet represents the "upper class" where life is just better, and Adam's planet is basically the slums. Its extremely frowned upon for people from the two planets to interact.
 |
| Seriously...dizzying but awesome. |
The main two actors are pretty good, Jim Sturgess being far better of the two, but I thought Timothy Spall stole the show. Without spoiling anything, he plays a co-worker of Adam, but from the opposite world. Their interactions are actually really fun to watch and listen to, and the visual layout of their scenes is really cool since they're on opposite worlds.
 |
| Gravity. It's a bitch. |
I do however have to call out a few very poorly done parts of the movie, starting with the narration in the beginning/end of the movie. I think Jim Sturgess is a very talented young actor who wasn't utilized enough after his initial breakthrough success in "Across The Universe", but that said, his narrating is weak, at best. It sounds like he's trying to seductively whisper into your ear and tell you the story of someone else he loves. *shudder*
On top of that, the story itself follows way too much of a cookie-cutter pattern. I feel like they spent so much time on the visual effects that they forgot there had to be a story too! My final beef with the movie is that while the visuals are unlike almost any movie I've seen in recent memory, they suffer the same fate as equally visually striking movies (e.g. "Cloverfield" or "Inception"): you will almost assuredly get dizzy or a headache watching this movie. The gravity-play is absolutely great, but it is a bit headache-inducing.
PLEASE don't let that deter you, though! I highly suggest everyone give this movie a chance! If not just for the visuals.
 |
| No seriously, the visuals are fantastic. |
Verdict: 7 out of 10
I really wish I could rate this movie higher, and say that its one of my new favorites, but the story was just too weak to merit any higher. A pretty even mix of good and terrible acting tend to balance out, and honestly for this movie being as short as it is (roughly 100 mins) I feel like it could have been longer, had a little more story to it, and it would have been a blockbuster. Instead it seems to be one that is somewhat lesser known. I don't even remember it coming to theaters...
I HIGHLY recommend you watch it, IT'S ON NETFLIX! But I can't say its one that I would go out and buy.
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